"'Ello poppets!!"
I hope everyone is having an amazing, restful, SAFE and enjoyable summer thus far. Believe me, you are missed. Achingly. Terribly. Horrifically.
So, because of being the dork that I am, and also because we never got a chance to actually discuss The Perks of Being a Wallflower I thought we could do a sort of informal, online 204 reunion/book group right here on our old blog. Naturally, you are no longer under my watchful eye, therefore this is completely voluntary, not graded in any way and solely for fun--Bunje-fun as Niah and Harmonica would say.
So, without further ado....
What did you think of Perks? What did you like/dislike, who was your favorite character and why?
Also, if you have started your AP Lit summer assignment yet, tell me about the similarites you see between Holden Caulfield and Charlie. (For you fools that did NOT take AP Lit even though you should have, Holden Caufield is a character from the iconic novel The Catcher in the Rye) You can look on Spark Notes and get a feel for the character.
Is Charlie a relatable character or did you find him completely foreign?
If you have any questions or just feel like commenting, by all means "hit me up!" (I looooove my slang dictionary!)
250 words/50pts (for ol' times sake!)
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Friday, June 6, 2008
President Pinero's Projections...Enjoy
Leslie Pinero’s Occasional Paper
#4 (the last one everrrrrrrrr )
Who’s Who in the year 2020…
For anyone that can remember back to being in Hess, in accelerated English with Mrs. Hudson, you may recall doing this project. We had to write about where some of our classmates will be in the year 2020. I found mine a few weeks ago and a lot of it is pretty funny. And of course, after reading it, I knew I had to do it for this class. But, to make things more interesting, I added every AP Lang student this year in the mix. And according to the results, it’s true. We are all destined for amazing, bright, successful, and happy futures. For some reason, I tend to pop in at some point in everyone’s future. Everything I do stands for everything I would like to do, dream about doing, or hope to be when I grow up. So, let the predictions begin!!!
Emily Brill- Emily Brill’s name will be highly well-known in the NYC area as she will be one of the most respected journalistic writers the NY Times has ever had. Her brief articles gain fans from all over, sending in the big bucks. She has appeared on numerous talk shows, her favorite being on the late night show, with Steven Colbert, having one of her zesty pieces be the talk of the whole show, generating numerous jokes and publicity. She also was a special guest on Leslie Pinero’s talk show, “Laughing with Leslie.” Still keeping in close contact with Joanna, she does not have time for children just yet but she is the proud god-mother of Joanna’s kids.
Andrew Cain- Andrew Cain. Need I say more? The image of Andrew’s face, especially his flowy brown, luscious hair will never leave our eyes, for he gets the opportunity of a life time, becoming a male hair model. Being the star in countless commercials for Pantene Hair Products (since he beat out Leslie Pinero for the job), we, and our children, all get to see him do that infamous flip of the hair every single time our TV shows go on break. And girls, he’s still single and ready to mingle, as always, so Google this bad boy up and get some digits!
Courtney Tomasello- This may come as a HUGE, IMMENSE, CRAZY, INSANE shock to most of you, but believe it or not, Courtney has become the proud owner of her very own horse farm-but not just any horse farm. Located in the outskirts of Utah, Courtney’s farm has attracted tourists and other horse lovers from all across America, and Canada. In fact, she is now married to a gorgeous Canadian cowboy who proposed to her while the two rode on one horse, named bubba, to a picnic in the corn field. They played “find the ring in the hay stack” where she dug for countless hours through hundreds of bales of hay until her engagement ring was found. Her biggest clients who have taken horse back rides through her beautiful trails are George Clooney, who, yes folks, is still alive and still looking better than ever, Justin Timberlake, starlet Leslie Pinero, and all three of the Jonas Brothers. It’s safe to say life with Courtney is oodles of fun.
Amber Cruse/Kylie Brock- For anyone that can remember back in Oakcrest at Cabaret night, these two acting divas were a hit. What started out as a simple high school skit, eventually made its way to the big screen. With their acting experience, they skipped college, went straight to California and pitched their idea for a new movie titled, “Girl, Please!” in fact, this movie was such a block buster, they’re already co-producing/directing the sequel, “Stay Back, or I’ll Slap.” They tried the title, “My best friend Leslie says, she’s just being Kylie,” but Amber got jealous…hence the more hostile titles.
Mister Blake Carlton- With a name like Mister, Blake did what anyone else would do: he graduated from a Liberal Arts college in Tennessee where he studied instrumentals. Still keeping his band dreams in sight, he married a band class mate 8 days after his college graduation just so he could have a wife named “Mrs. Mister Blake Carlton. After enjoying that title for a few years, he called up his divorce attorney, Leslie Pinero, letting Blake go back to his high school sweet heart who he secretly had loved all along. Together he and Caitlin Casper had a girl and a boy. Can anyone guess their names? Yup. You got it: Mister Blake Carlton Jr. and Miss Caitlin Carlton Jr.-they call her Missy for short.
Devon Schenker- Graduating from Lehigh’s engineering school, top of her class, it was obvious Devon was going to be the one bringing home the bacon. Living in North Carolina, Devon and her husband, a successful Ice cream Truck Driver, excuse me-a good-looking, sexy ice cream truck driver- had 3 children. Hearing that ice cream song playing loud down the street gives her butterflies every summer evening. Sometimes he even lets her drive it. She is in the process of designing a new model of ice-cream trucks, with help from her engineering partner, Leslie Pinero, and the design is expected to become the standard ice-cream truck for all American states so get ready ice cream lovers, I scream, you scream, we all scream for Devon Schenker’s new Ice Cream Truck renovations. The catchy tune will ring in our ears and every time we hear it coming down our street, we’ll always think of good Ol’ Devon.
Rosy Le Vu- Rosy, to much of our surprise, landed her secret dream job: a radio talk show host. Here, every night starting at 8 p.m, Rosy talks our ears off, playing al the songs we request and answers all of our problems. She did not go to college, against her parents will, since she took this opportunity of a life time after meeting Delilah on 96.9 WFPG who was getting ill and weak from old age. Needing a new host, Delilah saw Rosy singing to her self of the side of the road and instantly new Rosy was the next Delilah. On her first live radio show ever, her first call came in from Leslie Pinero, and Rosy’s reviews sky-rocketed. In fact, the name “Rosy” just fits perfectly in the tune: it goes from “Delilahhh” to “Rosyyyy”. The once quiet Rosy is now the chatter box we all know and love.
Mikey Henry- always having a knack for the computer world, Mike went to MIT majoring in computer engineering where he became the next Bill gates. Okay, just kidding, he’s not that successful…yet. He did however, have Steve Jobbs, the co-founder of Apple Computer Company, as his professor and got a high paying job working with him as his personal assistant, along with his very own secretary, Leslie Pinero. Jobbs tells Mikey he sees good things in his future-very good things. But secretly behind Jobbs’ back, Mikey is creating his very own search Engine, hoping to make out just like the creators of Google.
Gary/Rachel Carlson- ah, Gary Carlson, the all around perfect student, perfect athlete, heck-the perfect person. Well guys, nothing has changed. He played every sport there is known to man in college, including curling! He went to the Olympics, won the Silver medal (Leslie Pinero beat him and took the Gold) and he now is the Poster Man for Nike. Do I even have to say how much money he makes in the year? But Rachel Carlson is not too far behind his success. Do we not remember her in Oakcrest- geez, I don’t know what their families ate but they must have had a lot of Wheaties because Rachel still continues her athletic tactics as well. In college, Rachel received MVP and team captain on 3 separate sports teams, while still balancing her perfect 4.0 GPA. When Nike caught eye of her skills, they told Gatorade and now Rachel is the face label for every bottle. She even gets a life time supply!
Mike Galli- Mike did not go to college, he did not pass ‘GO’, and he definitely did not collect $200. He lives in a garbage can where he idolizes his childhood friend “the Grouch” on Sesame St. As passersby donate change to his tin lid, using mental math, he accurately calculates the exact amount before it even lands on the lid. This trick has brought him far. People now throw coins in the air and before they hit the ground, he screams out the amount and if he’s right, which come on guys, it’s Mike Galli, he’s always right, he gets to keep that amount. Okay, just kidding. We’re talking about Mike Galli, the mathematician, over here. Like all of us already predicted, Mike graduates from Stanford, where he now is a professor teaching his students with a math textbook he co-wrote, along with math-master Leslie Pinero. In fact, he discovered 8 new formulas in calculus 4 AND found out that there actually is and end to Pi. Oh, and he’s married to his beautiful wife, Devin Palermo and they have 6 little mikes running around already solving algebraic equations at the age of 3.
Dave Mroz/Megan Coburn- well, well, well, it didn’t take much brain power to predict this one. Go figure- the picture perfect couple, Dave and Megan, got married. The two blonde beauties both went to the same college. Megan majored in education and is now a high school cheer leading coach. Dave, ready to make lots of moolah, became the CEO of Huggies. Yes, I know, he’s a diaper man, but with the cash he’s bringing in, he could fit thousands in diapers with cash. Plus, it’s very convenient since he is a father of 5. Megan’s oldest daughter, who’s 6, already won national titles in cheerleading, though Leslie Pinero and her team beat her in the international competition. Dave has their oldest boy playing for the state’s little league team. What do you know, it’s the cutest life of the cutest couple, according to the Class of 2009’s year book senior superlatives.
Mike Townley- yes, everyone, the show Jeopardy is still on ABC in the 2020 and you would never guess who the host is: Oakcrest’s very own, Mike Townley. So instead of the contestants saying, “make it a true, Alex” now they say, “make it a true, Mike.” Apparently all of his historical trivia based knowledge paid off. Before the show, he majored in war history and wrote 7 novels, making him a nationally recognized name. So when this gig came around, America was ecstatic with the transitions from Alex to Mike. Leslie Pinero was next in line for the job but the producers said that Mike had more knowledge on random facts. Oh please! They act like he knows as much as Mr. Cervi or something…oh wait, he knows more.
Katie Lolla- Katie is a mother, a sweet mother to two beautiful girls. Her daughters are what inspired her to write. Every chance she got, she’d write and before she knew it she was looking at bunches of children books, books about growing, books about experiences. After children books, Katie took her writing career to a new level. She began to talk more about her experiences and has written 3 books that have been directed to teenage girls about being yourself and enjoying life. Her messages are so inspiring; Oprah has put them on her top book lists, making Katie quite the celebrity. And, with her books as one of Oprah’s favorites, we know whose Katie’s biggest fan- Erin Hall, and her second biggest fan being Leslie Pinero.
Jeannie Weaver- Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming, swimming, swimming. Jeannie Weaver lived by Dory’s song. Even in the year 2020, Jeannie has yet to get out of the pool. In fact, after making it to the Olympics and receiving the silver medal just like Gary (unfortunately, Leslie Pinero took the Gold for her record breaker in the free-style), Jeannie came back and opened her own swim training facility where young girls wanting to grow up to become Jeannies from all over come and have her coach them. With this money, she has a built in Olympic size pool in her back yard-pretty nifty huh?
Tawni Windsor- has anyone been to NYC lately? Well if you’ve read Emily Brill’s articles in the NY Times you’d see the high reviews for none other than Tawni Windsor in her new act, “Dancing to the Beat of your own Drum.” Still twirling her rifle some odd years later, Tawni now performs right in the heart of NYC, dancing to songs choreographed by Leslie Pinero, and of course, with rifle in hand.
Danielle Capelluti- Like oh em gee! Apparently Danielle’s 11:11 wishes all came true. Living on top of the world, Danielle Capellutti’s got it all. The looks, the personality, and of course…her vocabulary. Oh yea, and she’s got the brains too. In fact, she created an entirely new way to text, which has not only saved time, become more fun and convenient, but she actually is the creator of an entirely new language that people all over the world use. It’s so universal-it’s basically like sign language-but in texts! She also has her own reality T.V show on MTV, hosted by Leslie Pinero, called “IDK, My BFF Dan!?” it’s a hit. Everyone loves it, especially her husband, Tom Brady. Age is just a number in Danielle’s eyes.
Nick Cincotti- what started from a simple, little Baby Contest in his high school English class, burgeoned into his future. This picture was just a baby picture but, it’s shocking resemblance of his face 10 years later was unbelievable. Actually, what’s makes it so crazy is that he takes pictures today, in 2020, and still has that exact same face. He now gets paid to have studies done on him to see what is in him that is giving them “everlasting youth” look. Make-up products everywhere are constantly at his front door asking for his secret, but he’ll never tell. He is still close friends with Jake Taylor who continues to beg him for the secret. Leslie Pinero still holds a grudge against him, since she had high hopes of having her baby picture of her with her sister’s underwear on her head plastered all over America and Google, but his picture stole the limelight and Nick came out on top.
Caitlin Mauk- it’s safe to say, all the stress paid off for Caitlin Mauk. Once accepted into Georgetown, she knew her life would be unfolding into a dream she’s wanted since she was little. She became a rock star. Okay, not really but she did become highly well-known and respected. How can I put this. She lives in a big, big, very pretty, white house. And she’s a lady. The first lady. That’s right, folks! Cait’s in the White House. After Leslie Pinero’s Presidency term ended, she passed over the house to Cait and her Husband. She’s not exactly the President but behind closed doors, she wears the pants in the relationship. She makes all the calls, all the decisions, all the appointments. And even with all of her busy work with changing the world of politics, she still has time to hang out with her bestest bud Courtney…Courtney Sherman, that is- not the crazy lady in Utah who digs through hay stacks all day.
Christine Scannell- also known as the pink trapper keeper. Who remembers Lisa frank-you know, the lady who made school supplies with rainbows colors and cute animal faces? Well, picture that but all pink and with the name signed in the corner reading Christine Scannell, instead of Lisa Frank. She has helped millions of students get organized with her snazzy supplies. As an elementary teacher, she provides her students with her products and they work wonders. The theme is pink. Pink. Pink. Pink. Pink. Pink. On the side, she also teaches dance, and yes, they all wear pink tu-tus, including her most improved student whom she is very proud of, Leslie Pinero.
Felicia Graumann- with some help from Caitlin Mauk, Felicia now proudly plays her flute for the President before every dinner. Caitlin somehow talked the Congress into letting them build a guest house on the side of the property just for Felicia and her family. And with her brother Joe, high in Congress already, they were able to pull a few strings. Right in the heart of Washington D.C she teaches music lessons and organizes performances at the White House. It has grown into a highly selective camp where aspiring musicians come to her, hoping they have what it takes to play for the President. Leslie Pinero attempted to see if she had what it take by playing the Piano but when Felicia realized Leslie could only play one song with one hand, she was booted from the prestigious camp.
Erin Hall- Erin always had a philosophical way of thinking. She always had a knack for solving problems for other people. Back in high school when she would solve problems for her best friend Leslie Pinero, she would call herself Dr. Phil. She also had a strong talent in acting. So put it all together and what do you get? Oprah, ladies and gentlemen, the next generation. The producers flushed away the name ‘Harpo Productions” and introduced “Nire Productions”. She is currently working on her magazine “ER”. She wanted just “E” but that’s already taken. On one of her first shows she was reunited with an old high school friend who told America about a whole new way to text, and more importantly to promote her show. Her name was Danielle Capelluti. Even with her busy life giving to the whole entire world and being the highest paid woman in the country, Erin is still very close to Leslie and Becca. She is happily married to the love of her life, and they have 3 children. Oh and, just to throw it out there, she is constantly stalked by some old dirt bag who smokes and has taken over Mr. Lockwood’s job back at Oakcrest, since he never really left the high school scene. His name is Bryant Little. He’s on America’s Most Wanted just so you know, and Caitlin Mauk is doing everything in her power to find him and lock him up.
Michelle Martinez- always being very intellectual, Michelle became an advocate for equal rights and goes around to high schools all across America teaching students their rights and the do’s and don’t s of citizenship. With a boy on the way, she is excited to become a mommy. While visiting one high school, she looked into the crowd of students and saw Leslie Pinero who was video-taping her for the local news broadcast. This instant publicity gave Michelle the idea to take her speeches live to the televisions screen. As of right now, she is working on getting more news coverage and thanks Leslie for helping initiate her dream.
Jon Henry- getting into college was a breeze for Jon Henry. Graduating with honors was a skip, hop, and a jump. And making it to Hollywood?-piece of cake. Fresh out of college, Jon decided to do Stand-Up comedy. Co-starring in a act with high school buddies Drew Haas, Paul Brower, and of course everyone’s favorite, Alex Barone, okay no, Alex, but still the hilarious trio made people laugh all across the U.S. with his weird stories about dragons, squirrels, and cup-cake stealing monkeys, and Leslie Pinero’s Thunder Thighs made the crowd roar and cry tears of laughter. But soon he got tired of standing up and wanted to sit down-in Hollywood movies. He landed a role in, “The Lord of the Flies” the re-make and it could not have been better. He won best actor and his career boomed. Now starring in the movie, “Harry Potter: Reunion at Hogwarts,” Jon plays Harry all grown up and could not be happier.
Daniel Lang- Danny’s still got that long surfer hair. It’s a lot blonder now since he is constantly out in the sun…rowing of course. After graduating from U Penn with a crew scholarship, his love for rowing down Boat House Row never left him. Now living in Pennsylvania with his wife, he rows professionally and is tanner than ever. Together they visit Hershey Park, where they unexpectedly ran into Leslie Pinero who was dressed up as a Hershey Kiss for the day. Believe it or not, his voice has dropped another octave! Just when you thought his voice couldn’t be deeper- it is. He does not have kids just yet, but he plans to eventually go back to Mays Landing soon to raise his kids there and become the crew coach at Oakcrest with Mr. Sera who is still rowing strong.
Kimberle Watt/Jake Taylor- Kim graduated from the University of Maryland with high honors- shocked? She now lives in Virginia, working as a pharmacist, making loads of money. She lives right next door to her best friend Leslie Pinero, just as she’d always had. She is happily married to her husband, Jake Taylor. That’s right- Kim and Jake get married. See, it all started back in high school when Kim had a crush on Jake. It went no where and she moved on. Looking back and laughing she wrote about it in her last Occasional Paper of the year and her words never left Jake. He too, went to college in Maryland, where he played soccer. He later won the National Spelling Bee. He knew he’d win since he was the Master Vocab Champ back in Oakcrest. He now is sillier than ever before. As his career, he creates bumper stickers which are so well-known, even Facebook is using them now! Way to go, Jake! Oh and his mom longer packs him a cute perfect little lunch anymore…Kim does.
Becca Irwin- Once accepted in NYU, Becca was the happiest little camper. She majored in fashion marketing and is the designer and CEO of her very own clothing line, entitled, “bec”. It’s the new hot style that is sooo 2020’s. Even though Leslie Pinero was rejected from America’s Next Top Model, she was hired as one of Becca’s first models to show off her trendy out fits. She is happily married to an amazing husband who she actually knew for a pretty long time. They have 2 girls and 2 boys, all who play softball and baseball. And just like their mommy, the girls are the best on their team, even if stupid Coach Raph and Coach Fresne didn’t notice it.
Dumebi Emetanjo- Du has gotten big…physically. She is a professional body builder and struts her stuff all day, lifting 800 pound weights and carrying 1 ton iron balls. As we know, Du never really was the extremely athletic or strong type of person. But back in her junior year of high school, she had the sudden urge to join Tilton Fitness Gym along with a few other friends, including Monica Mackleer, Leslie Pinero, and Scott Gibson. Together the 3 worked out and had fun but Du always took it to the next level. Before she knew it, she was a massive chocolate sundae-with extra dark chocolate fudge. She is now the proud owner of “Emetanjo Exercising- Do it Du’s Way.” She couldn’t be more happy with the results.
Courtney Sherman- The talented Courtney Sherman did not leave her talents and interests back in high school. She carried them through college and beyond. Sure she was a cute little band geek, but she was also quite the actress, especially back in Oakcrest when she and Leslie Pinero shared the stage together in numerous One Acts and Musicals. After college, she moved to L.A with her best friend Arthur to pursue her acting career. Together they made the perfect team and got two lead roles in the new T.V Series, “Band Buddies.” And you’ll never guess who the director of the show is- Mr. Tobias. But don’t think he stopped teaching band class at Oakcrest. No sir-ree, he’s still leading the marching Ambassadors to glory and Courtney comes home periodically to assist and help him. Since he can only drive around in his motorized scooter and oxygen tank, Courtney takes much care of him. And when Caitlin Mauk has big dinner parties at the White House, the first 2 guests are always Courtney and Mr. T.
Emily Capille/Emily Mehler- always being such a good listener, Emily Capille became a psychologist. Life was good for Emily. She sat on a big, comfy couch (not like the little TV show) and she listened to people’s problems and she solved them. But one little visit at work changed her life forever. She was sitting in her office, waiting for some crazy, mental case who was terrified of string cheese, to walk in for their weekly visit. But instead some very motherly looking woman entered the room trying to promote a Yoga class she was instructing. When she looked closely, Emily Capille realized it was her high school friend Emily Mehler who she had lost touch with. The two went to Yoga classes together and Emily Capille suddenly realized something- she wanted to be an Astronaut. Why an astronaut you may ask? Well, I have no idea. My guess is after hearing so many crazy people talk she went crazy herself but if you ever plan a trip up to space, maybe you can stop by and ask her why she chose to be one. And while you’re at it, get some Yoga instructing from Emily Mehler. Supposedly, it’s even more relaxing with no gravity, according to Leslie Pinero who has traveled up North many a time to take Emily Mehler’s galactic yoga class.
Alli McCarthy- Alli, one of the sweetest girls from Oakcrest, has not changed one bit. She still is constantly smiling and laughing and has yet to hurt a fly (well, minus the road kill she’s hit with her car in the past). She is now a tennis all-star and competes with Venus and Serena. Okay, just kidding. She stopped playing after high school. Maybe she and Leslie Pinero should’ve actually taken those lessons instead of just talking about them for so long. But she did however become a mom of three and all 3 of her kids will soon be learning to play tennis very well. She is a 2nd grade teacher in Mullica and yes, she is still best friends with Jackie Longo. We’re you really expecting anything different?
James Wilkes/Meghan Brennan- In the year 2020, J Dubs is a star athlete. He played football at Penn state, living his dream, and was quickly picked up by the NFL. He now took over Bret Favre’s spot on the best team ever- the Green Bay Packers…Green Bay all the way!” and has brought his team to victory. They have won 4 super bowls in a row in which Leslie Pinero has attended all. One time James looked up at the score board and saw Leslie’s face on the screen wearing her big, yellow cheese-head hat. James’ wife, Meghan Brennan, couldn’t be more proud of him. In fact, it was on Green Bay’s historical Lambeau Field where he popped the question. Meghan, now a physical therapist and high school field hockey coach, just like her mother, was overwhelmed and accepted. The happy couple has 4 children and a dog named Blake. Oh, and yes, Meghan still does those weird hick-up things every now and then.
Darrell Johnson- Darrell didn’t go to college but he did become the manager of Wawa. Alright, I lied. Darrell is actually very successful. After playing baseball at UCLA, Darrell made it to the major leagues and now plays as the catcher for the Phillies. His wife, who is obviously very crafty in making things, made him his very own baseball card. The two have 4 kids. Two boys and two girls. The lovely married couple visit regularly with good friends Dave and Megan and of course Darrell’s dear pal Zander as well, as their busy family friend, Leslie Pinero.
Niah Grimes- move out Tyra Banks and say hello to Niah Grimes. Niah skipped college. She knew she was too good, too beautiful, too unique to waste her precious time sitting in a class room, listening to some dull old man speak about some dumb educational topic. Niah was better than that. She knew her gorgeous looks could not go to waste. When she was 18, an adult, she made a promise to herself that she would not stop run-walking around until every single human living on this earth got a chance to see her beautiful, one of a kind face. First she left home to go to New York City with nothing but a pair of stilettos. She figured that if Bunje can go to Taiwan with nothing but a backpack for a month, she could make in NYC. Plus, she just assumed any guy would drop to his knees and give her anything she ever wanted with just a wink of an eye anyway. So off she went, strutting her heavenly body down the streets of New York. First she met some drug dealers and prostitutes that were jealous she was taking their corners, but then Hugh Hefner, who is still kicking strong, found her and brought her to California. She jumped right into the modeling business and quickly kicked boring old Tyra off of her Pedestal. She became a fashion diva and a super model. Now, she is the new host of America’s Next Top Model Pete D’Amico tried out, along with Andrew Cain and Leslie Pinero, but she rejected all of them. She is all alone with no husband and no kids. Okay she’s not all alone, she’s dating Michael Jackson’s son and she couldn’t be happier. The crazy, kooky, gorgeous couple is living in their Hollywood mansion and they are loving life.
Zander Peralejo- Here comes the next Stephen Spielberg! Zander and his brother Armando now own their own film production company. Together, they have already filmed 87 short films about zombies. But Zander has taken his career even father. He parties with all the top celebs and they gladly take part in his movies. His favorite actors have been Mike Myers, Miley Cyrus, Jessica Alba, Chris Rock, and Jim Carrey. Leslie Pinero has appeared as an extra in many of his films as well. For Bunje’s sake, he hired Johnny Depp to play one of his leads, but unfortunately, Mr. Depp just wasn’t good enough. Recently, one of his greatest accomplishments was being “Punk’d” by Ashton Kutcher in 2018 when they tricked Zander into thinking his pet iguana turned into Godzilla.
Laina Lusk- Laina, the poised, intelligent, sensitive Laina had always been destined for great things as soon as Mike Galli realized she was before him in class rank and created this large jealousy of her. Everyone knew she was one of the smartest when she was a genius in AP Gov. but her smarts never did diminished. She graduated from Brown University and went to law School at Yale. She is now an attorney and is living large. She is not married yet because this power-house is too busy making money, however, she somehow miraculously still finds time to own her own Chinese Market where she sells paper origami of all animals species in Costa Rica. One day, while she was in Costa Rica looking for a new species, she saw Leslie Pinero in a tree bird-watching up close. Laina is now in the process of writing her own novel on how to get good grades on AP tests and SATs. And to help modernize her teachings, her dear friend Mikey Henry is already started on creating a computer program for her to sell.
Joanna Zachowski- “Eat to live; Don’t live to eat.” These words came out of Jo’s mouth one fine day when she was training her best friend Leslie Pinero to eat less and exercise more so that her Thunder Thighs will reduce. This inspired her to become a personal trainer and fitness coach for top college athletes. She has written numerous books on dietary trips and healthy living. Like Danny Lang, she also continues her rowing but her more in a subtle surrounding. She and her hubby Jake live in a gorgeous house, over looking a lake where they row together. Occasionally Leslie pops by, sometimes riding along side them in a little kayak, but she always get’s tired and decides to give up and go get some ice cream or cheez-its- she never tells Jo though.
Emily Rheault- Emily purposely graduated from Rowan and became a Kindergarten teacher, just to see if her students could write her last name correctly. She also went to Rowan just because it sounded close to her name. Okay, though some of that is true, she did have other motives. She teaches her students many things about technology so that when they get to Oakcrest and join Media with Mr. Lockwood they won’t be scared and intimidated like she and Leslie Pinero once were. During recess, she takes all of the girls and trains them to be butch now so that when they go to Oakcrest they will also join the Softball team and have a winning streak just so Ms. Raph is happy.
Brittany Schmidt - After graduating from Rutgers, Brittany put her musical ability and intelligence aside as her and Leslie Pinero both tried out for America’s Next Top Model. Having the figure she was looking for, Niah kept Brittany and now she is living in Beverly Hills as a model for Cover Girl. She is married to her love, Matt, and they have 22 kids…whoopsie! Typo..they have 2 kids.
Jon Miller- Jon graduated from the school of Hard Knox. Okay, he actually graduated from Oklahoma State- I know pretty random. During his career as a Book publisher, he randomly was getting lunch at Taco- Bell where he randomly ordered a taco from a random cashier named, Leslie Pinero. He gave her a $2.00 tip because he felt bad and it reminded him of how he sat next to her at lunch but never really talk to her. Oh and he also is also a millionaire and donated most of his cash to Book Companies around the world.
Peter D’Amico- Pete graduated from Harvard. I bet at this point you’re waiting for me to say ‘just kidding’. But I’m not. He really did….okay just kidding he really didn’t. But, he did graduate from Ohio State and while on the plane ride home he sat next to a woman dress in a rain forest outfit. She was on a connection flight coming home from Costa Rica. After they talked for a few minutes, he realized it was Leslie Pinero- his kindergarten love. When he looked at her wrist he saw she was wearing the bracelet he made her back when they were 5 and the two instantly fell in love, got married and lived happily ever after. Yea, no I was just kidding again. The two did meet on the plane though and they shared a few laughs. Then like always, he tried to kiss her and she pulled away laughing even more. Then when they existed the plane he saw her run up to her gorgeous husband..okay last time, I was just kidding. She was not married at the time but the two are still very good friends.
Monica Mackleer- Monica, though slacked and was a bit lazy, got into college. In fact, she went to the University of Virginia with her other self, Leslie Pinero. There the two studied together every week and never accomplished anything but eat a lot of food. Some things never changed. But luckily, Monica was still very close with Du and she had a free membership and ‘did it Du’s way’ at Emetanjo Exercises. Although back at Oakcrest, Monica was ‘incaple of love’, she overcame this disability and married a gay (and when I say gay, I just mean happy ) wonderful man who she loved very much. She became a martial arts instructor. Okay, I’m fibbing. She won the lottery and became a millionaire and never had to actually work for the rest of her life. She had a son named Coby after her life-long pal, her dog. Then she had a girl who she named Leslie but then remembered how close that was to Lesbian and decided to name her Cassandra, after her favorite teacher back in high school.
Hannah Johnson/JoeCamp- Hannah went to TCNJ and majored in education. During her last year in college, she came back to her life mentor, Ms. Bunje, who she had an internship with. Hannah soon became an AP Lang English teacher and on the first day of school, she had her students hang up stars of all of their dreams and goals. Sounds familiar anyone? Hannah is happily married to JoeCamp. Though they only live with each other during the summer while she is not teaching. During the long fall, winter, and spring months, Joe is off living in a little log cabin he built himself over-looking Walden Pond. There he sits, alone, with nature. He has become one with the deer and the squirrels. The trees are his parents. The wind is his sister. The sun is his guidance and the moon is his peace. The rainstorm and the river are his brothers. The heron and the otter are his friends. Okay, enough with the crap, JoeCamp sits on a log all day and stares at water. He’s like the male version of Pocahontas. During his days and nights at Waldon Pond, he has written a book. A long book. A painfully, boring long book, just like that of Thoreau’s. One day he saw a trespasser in the woods, when he looked closely, it was just Leslie Pinero collecting leaves for her scientific discovery.
Cassandra Bunje- okay, the moment everyone has been waiting for…where is Ms. Bunje in the year 2020??!?! Well, unfortunately, that person who already predicted her future was right. She already died years ago. Just kidingggggg! Don’t get mad, I was kidding in everyone’s..you knew it was coming! Anyway, Bunje is still a teacher at Oakcrest, where she teaches hundreds and hundreds of young aspiring students but they never replace her first AP kids. All of us remain in her hearts forever. She has already reached enlightenment, through our help, and she and Mrs. Rock are the best of friends. She is the god mother to all three of Mrs. Rock’s children and she owns 4 dogs and 20 cats. That’s right. Ms. Bunje turns into one of those crazy old ladies who lives with a bunch of cats. Alright just kidding again. Putting all jokes aside, Cassandra Bunje continues throughout her life, teaching everyone she encounters. Whether she spends years with them and teaches them quality AND quantity, or even if she sees them in Acme and talks to them for 1 minute, somehow Bunje’s way of leaving a lasting impact on everyone she meets never seems to leave her. It’s apparent she has left a huge impact on all of her AP kids as you can see they have all achieved high honors and happiness. Because of Bunje, ALL of her AP kids have been guided down their own path to enlightenment. And every time the school year comes to a close, every single one of them comes to visit her in June and keeps her posted on their lives. She is never forgotten and will be with us forever.
See? It’s amazing how everybody is helping somebody. Who ever said we’re never gonna see each other after high school was an idiot. By the looks of it, we’re all going to stay pretty close and by the way fate is turning out, we all are going to be a success in our own ways. So like Bunje said, it’s not a good-bye…it’s just a see-ya later. <3
I love you ALLLLL AP Langers!! And of course, you, Ms. Bunje!!
#4 (the last one everrrrrrrrr )
Who’s Who in the year 2020…
For anyone that can remember back to being in Hess, in accelerated English with Mrs. Hudson, you may recall doing this project. We had to write about where some of our classmates will be in the year 2020. I found mine a few weeks ago and a lot of it is pretty funny. And of course, after reading it, I knew I had to do it for this class. But, to make things more interesting, I added every AP Lang student this year in the mix. And according to the results, it’s true. We are all destined for amazing, bright, successful, and happy futures. For some reason, I tend to pop in at some point in everyone’s future. Everything I do stands for everything I would like to do, dream about doing, or hope to be when I grow up. So, let the predictions begin!!!
Emily Brill- Emily Brill’s name will be highly well-known in the NYC area as she will be one of the most respected journalistic writers the NY Times has ever had. Her brief articles gain fans from all over, sending in the big bucks. She has appeared on numerous talk shows, her favorite being on the late night show, with Steven Colbert, having one of her zesty pieces be the talk of the whole show, generating numerous jokes and publicity. She also was a special guest on Leslie Pinero’s talk show, “Laughing with Leslie.” Still keeping in close contact with Joanna, she does not have time for children just yet but she is the proud god-mother of Joanna’s kids.
Andrew Cain- Andrew Cain. Need I say more? The image of Andrew’s face, especially his flowy brown, luscious hair will never leave our eyes, for he gets the opportunity of a life time, becoming a male hair model. Being the star in countless commercials for Pantene Hair Products (since he beat out Leslie Pinero for the job), we, and our children, all get to see him do that infamous flip of the hair every single time our TV shows go on break. And girls, he’s still single and ready to mingle, as always, so Google this bad boy up and get some digits!
Courtney Tomasello- This may come as a HUGE, IMMENSE, CRAZY, INSANE shock to most of you, but believe it or not, Courtney has become the proud owner of her very own horse farm-but not just any horse farm. Located in the outskirts of Utah, Courtney’s farm has attracted tourists and other horse lovers from all across America, and Canada. In fact, she is now married to a gorgeous Canadian cowboy who proposed to her while the two rode on one horse, named bubba, to a picnic in the corn field. They played “find the ring in the hay stack” where she dug for countless hours through hundreds of bales of hay until her engagement ring was found. Her biggest clients who have taken horse back rides through her beautiful trails are George Clooney, who, yes folks, is still alive and still looking better than ever, Justin Timberlake, starlet Leslie Pinero, and all three of the Jonas Brothers. It’s safe to say life with Courtney is oodles of fun.
Amber Cruse/Kylie Brock- For anyone that can remember back in Oakcrest at Cabaret night, these two acting divas were a hit. What started out as a simple high school skit, eventually made its way to the big screen. With their acting experience, they skipped college, went straight to California and pitched their idea for a new movie titled, “Girl, Please!” in fact, this movie was such a block buster, they’re already co-producing/directing the sequel, “Stay Back, or I’ll Slap.” They tried the title, “My best friend Leslie says, she’s just being Kylie,” but Amber got jealous…hence the more hostile titles.
Mister Blake Carlton- With a name like Mister, Blake did what anyone else would do: he graduated from a Liberal Arts college in Tennessee where he studied instrumentals. Still keeping his band dreams in sight, he married a band class mate 8 days after his college graduation just so he could have a wife named “Mrs. Mister Blake Carlton. After enjoying that title for a few years, he called up his divorce attorney, Leslie Pinero, letting Blake go back to his high school sweet heart who he secretly had loved all along. Together he and Caitlin Casper had a girl and a boy. Can anyone guess their names? Yup. You got it: Mister Blake Carlton Jr. and Miss Caitlin Carlton Jr.-they call her Missy for short.
Devon Schenker- Graduating from Lehigh’s engineering school, top of her class, it was obvious Devon was going to be the one bringing home the bacon. Living in North Carolina, Devon and her husband, a successful Ice cream Truck Driver, excuse me-a good-looking, sexy ice cream truck driver- had 3 children. Hearing that ice cream song playing loud down the street gives her butterflies every summer evening. Sometimes he even lets her drive it. She is in the process of designing a new model of ice-cream trucks, with help from her engineering partner, Leslie Pinero, and the design is expected to become the standard ice-cream truck for all American states so get ready ice cream lovers, I scream, you scream, we all scream for Devon Schenker’s new Ice Cream Truck renovations. The catchy tune will ring in our ears and every time we hear it coming down our street, we’ll always think of good Ol’ Devon.
Rosy Le Vu- Rosy, to much of our surprise, landed her secret dream job: a radio talk show host. Here, every night starting at 8 p.m, Rosy talks our ears off, playing al the songs we request and answers all of our problems. She did not go to college, against her parents will, since she took this opportunity of a life time after meeting Delilah on 96.9 WFPG who was getting ill and weak from old age. Needing a new host, Delilah saw Rosy singing to her self of the side of the road and instantly new Rosy was the next Delilah. On her first live radio show ever, her first call came in from Leslie Pinero, and Rosy’s reviews sky-rocketed. In fact, the name “Rosy” just fits perfectly in the tune: it goes from “Delilahhh” to “Rosyyyy”. The once quiet Rosy is now the chatter box we all know and love.
Mikey Henry- always having a knack for the computer world, Mike went to MIT majoring in computer engineering where he became the next Bill gates. Okay, just kidding, he’s not that successful…yet. He did however, have Steve Jobbs, the co-founder of Apple Computer Company, as his professor and got a high paying job working with him as his personal assistant, along with his very own secretary, Leslie Pinero. Jobbs tells Mikey he sees good things in his future-very good things. But secretly behind Jobbs’ back, Mikey is creating his very own search Engine, hoping to make out just like the creators of Google.
Gary/Rachel Carlson- ah, Gary Carlson, the all around perfect student, perfect athlete, heck-the perfect person. Well guys, nothing has changed. He played every sport there is known to man in college, including curling! He went to the Olympics, won the Silver medal (Leslie Pinero beat him and took the Gold) and he now is the Poster Man for Nike. Do I even have to say how much money he makes in the year? But Rachel Carlson is not too far behind his success. Do we not remember her in Oakcrest- geez, I don’t know what their families ate but they must have had a lot of Wheaties because Rachel still continues her athletic tactics as well. In college, Rachel received MVP and team captain on 3 separate sports teams, while still balancing her perfect 4.0 GPA. When Nike caught eye of her skills, they told Gatorade and now Rachel is the face label for every bottle. She even gets a life time supply!
Mike Galli- Mike did not go to college, he did not pass ‘GO’, and he definitely did not collect $200. He lives in a garbage can where he idolizes his childhood friend “the Grouch” on Sesame St. As passersby donate change to his tin lid, using mental math, he accurately calculates the exact amount before it even lands on the lid. This trick has brought him far. People now throw coins in the air and before they hit the ground, he screams out the amount and if he’s right, which come on guys, it’s Mike Galli, he’s always right, he gets to keep that amount. Okay, just kidding. We’re talking about Mike Galli, the mathematician, over here. Like all of us already predicted, Mike graduates from Stanford, where he now is a professor teaching his students with a math textbook he co-wrote, along with math-master Leslie Pinero. In fact, he discovered 8 new formulas in calculus 4 AND found out that there actually is and end to Pi. Oh, and he’s married to his beautiful wife, Devin Palermo and they have 6 little mikes running around already solving algebraic equations at the age of 3.
Dave Mroz/Megan Coburn- well, well, well, it didn’t take much brain power to predict this one. Go figure- the picture perfect couple, Dave and Megan, got married. The two blonde beauties both went to the same college. Megan majored in education and is now a high school cheer leading coach. Dave, ready to make lots of moolah, became the CEO of Huggies. Yes, I know, he’s a diaper man, but with the cash he’s bringing in, he could fit thousands in diapers with cash. Plus, it’s very convenient since he is a father of 5. Megan’s oldest daughter, who’s 6, already won national titles in cheerleading, though Leslie Pinero and her team beat her in the international competition. Dave has their oldest boy playing for the state’s little league team. What do you know, it’s the cutest life of the cutest couple, according to the Class of 2009’s year book senior superlatives.
Mike Townley- yes, everyone, the show Jeopardy is still on ABC in the 2020 and you would never guess who the host is: Oakcrest’s very own, Mike Townley. So instead of the contestants saying, “make it a true, Alex” now they say, “make it a true, Mike.” Apparently all of his historical trivia based knowledge paid off. Before the show, he majored in war history and wrote 7 novels, making him a nationally recognized name. So when this gig came around, America was ecstatic with the transitions from Alex to Mike. Leslie Pinero was next in line for the job but the producers said that Mike had more knowledge on random facts. Oh please! They act like he knows as much as Mr. Cervi or something…oh wait, he knows more.
Katie Lolla- Katie is a mother, a sweet mother to two beautiful girls. Her daughters are what inspired her to write. Every chance she got, she’d write and before she knew it she was looking at bunches of children books, books about growing, books about experiences. After children books, Katie took her writing career to a new level. She began to talk more about her experiences and has written 3 books that have been directed to teenage girls about being yourself and enjoying life. Her messages are so inspiring; Oprah has put them on her top book lists, making Katie quite the celebrity. And, with her books as one of Oprah’s favorites, we know whose Katie’s biggest fan- Erin Hall, and her second biggest fan being Leslie Pinero.
Jeannie Weaver- Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming, swimming, swimming. Jeannie Weaver lived by Dory’s song. Even in the year 2020, Jeannie has yet to get out of the pool. In fact, after making it to the Olympics and receiving the silver medal just like Gary (unfortunately, Leslie Pinero took the Gold for her record breaker in the free-style), Jeannie came back and opened her own swim training facility where young girls wanting to grow up to become Jeannies from all over come and have her coach them. With this money, she has a built in Olympic size pool in her back yard-pretty nifty huh?
Tawni Windsor- has anyone been to NYC lately? Well if you’ve read Emily Brill’s articles in the NY Times you’d see the high reviews for none other than Tawni Windsor in her new act, “Dancing to the Beat of your own Drum.” Still twirling her rifle some odd years later, Tawni now performs right in the heart of NYC, dancing to songs choreographed by Leslie Pinero, and of course, with rifle in hand.
Danielle Capelluti- Like oh em gee! Apparently Danielle’s 11:11 wishes all came true. Living on top of the world, Danielle Capellutti’s got it all. The looks, the personality, and of course…her vocabulary. Oh yea, and she’s got the brains too. In fact, she created an entirely new way to text, which has not only saved time, become more fun and convenient, but she actually is the creator of an entirely new language that people all over the world use. It’s so universal-it’s basically like sign language-but in texts! She also has her own reality T.V show on MTV, hosted by Leslie Pinero, called “IDK, My BFF Dan!?” it’s a hit. Everyone loves it, especially her husband, Tom Brady. Age is just a number in Danielle’s eyes.
Nick Cincotti- what started from a simple, little Baby Contest in his high school English class, burgeoned into his future. This picture was just a baby picture but, it’s shocking resemblance of his face 10 years later was unbelievable. Actually, what’s makes it so crazy is that he takes pictures today, in 2020, and still has that exact same face. He now gets paid to have studies done on him to see what is in him that is giving them “everlasting youth” look. Make-up products everywhere are constantly at his front door asking for his secret, but he’ll never tell. He is still close friends with Jake Taylor who continues to beg him for the secret. Leslie Pinero still holds a grudge against him, since she had high hopes of having her baby picture of her with her sister’s underwear on her head plastered all over America and Google, but his picture stole the limelight and Nick came out on top.
Caitlin Mauk- it’s safe to say, all the stress paid off for Caitlin Mauk. Once accepted into Georgetown, she knew her life would be unfolding into a dream she’s wanted since she was little. She became a rock star. Okay, not really but she did become highly well-known and respected. How can I put this. She lives in a big, big, very pretty, white house. And she’s a lady. The first lady. That’s right, folks! Cait’s in the White House. After Leslie Pinero’s Presidency term ended, she passed over the house to Cait and her Husband. She’s not exactly the President but behind closed doors, she wears the pants in the relationship. She makes all the calls, all the decisions, all the appointments. And even with all of her busy work with changing the world of politics, she still has time to hang out with her bestest bud Courtney…Courtney Sherman, that is- not the crazy lady in Utah who digs through hay stacks all day.
Christine Scannell- also known as the pink trapper keeper. Who remembers Lisa frank-you know, the lady who made school supplies with rainbows colors and cute animal faces? Well, picture that but all pink and with the name signed in the corner reading Christine Scannell, instead of Lisa Frank. She has helped millions of students get organized with her snazzy supplies. As an elementary teacher, she provides her students with her products and they work wonders. The theme is pink. Pink. Pink. Pink. Pink. Pink. On the side, she also teaches dance, and yes, they all wear pink tu-tus, including her most improved student whom she is very proud of, Leslie Pinero.
Felicia Graumann- with some help from Caitlin Mauk, Felicia now proudly plays her flute for the President before every dinner. Caitlin somehow talked the Congress into letting them build a guest house on the side of the property just for Felicia and her family. And with her brother Joe, high in Congress already, they were able to pull a few strings. Right in the heart of Washington D.C she teaches music lessons and organizes performances at the White House. It has grown into a highly selective camp where aspiring musicians come to her, hoping they have what it takes to play for the President. Leslie Pinero attempted to see if she had what it take by playing the Piano but when Felicia realized Leslie could only play one song with one hand, she was booted from the prestigious camp.
Erin Hall- Erin always had a philosophical way of thinking. She always had a knack for solving problems for other people. Back in high school when she would solve problems for her best friend Leslie Pinero, she would call herself Dr. Phil. She also had a strong talent in acting. So put it all together and what do you get? Oprah, ladies and gentlemen, the next generation. The producers flushed away the name ‘Harpo Productions” and introduced “Nire Productions”. She is currently working on her magazine “ER”. She wanted just “E” but that’s already taken. On one of her first shows she was reunited with an old high school friend who told America about a whole new way to text, and more importantly to promote her show. Her name was Danielle Capelluti. Even with her busy life giving to the whole entire world and being the highest paid woman in the country, Erin is still very close to Leslie and Becca. She is happily married to the love of her life, and they have 3 children. Oh and, just to throw it out there, she is constantly stalked by some old dirt bag who smokes and has taken over Mr. Lockwood’s job back at Oakcrest, since he never really left the high school scene. His name is Bryant Little. He’s on America’s Most Wanted just so you know, and Caitlin Mauk is doing everything in her power to find him and lock him up.
Michelle Martinez- always being very intellectual, Michelle became an advocate for equal rights and goes around to high schools all across America teaching students their rights and the do’s and don’t s of citizenship. With a boy on the way, she is excited to become a mommy. While visiting one high school, she looked into the crowd of students and saw Leslie Pinero who was video-taping her for the local news broadcast. This instant publicity gave Michelle the idea to take her speeches live to the televisions screen. As of right now, she is working on getting more news coverage and thanks Leslie for helping initiate her dream.
Jon Henry- getting into college was a breeze for Jon Henry. Graduating with honors was a skip, hop, and a jump. And making it to Hollywood?-piece of cake. Fresh out of college, Jon decided to do Stand-Up comedy. Co-starring in a act with high school buddies Drew Haas, Paul Brower, and of course everyone’s favorite, Alex Barone, okay no, Alex, but still the hilarious trio made people laugh all across the U.S. with his weird stories about dragons, squirrels, and cup-cake stealing monkeys, and Leslie Pinero’s Thunder Thighs made the crowd roar and cry tears of laughter. But soon he got tired of standing up and wanted to sit down-in Hollywood movies. He landed a role in, “The Lord of the Flies” the re-make and it could not have been better. He won best actor and his career boomed. Now starring in the movie, “Harry Potter: Reunion at Hogwarts,” Jon plays Harry all grown up and could not be happier.
Daniel Lang- Danny’s still got that long surfer hair. It’s a lot blonder now since he is constantly out in the sun…rowing of course. After graduating from U Penn with a crew scholarship, his love for rowing down Boat House Row never left him. Now living in Pennsylvania with his wife, he rows professionally and is tanner than ever. Together they visit Hershey Park, where they unexpectedly ran into Leslie Pinero who was dressed up as a Hershey Kiss for the day. Believe it or not, his voice has dropped another octave! Just when you thought his voice couldn’t be deeper- it is. He does not have kids just yet, but he plans to eventually go back to Mays Landing soon to raise his kids there and become the crew coach at Oakcrest with Mr. Sera who is still rowing strong.
Kimberle Watt/Jake Taylor- Kim graduated from the University of Maryland with high honors- shocked? She now lives in Virginia, working as a pharmacist, making loads of money. She lives right next door to her best friend Leslie Pinero, just as she’d always had. She is happily married to her husband, Jake Taylor. That’s right- Kim and Jake get married. See, it all started back in high school when Kim had a crush on Jake. It went no where and she moved on. Looking back and laughing she wrote about it in her last Occasional Paper of the year and her words never left Jake. He too, went to college in Maryland, where he played soccer. He later won the National Spelling Bee. He knew he’d win since he was the Master Vocab Champ back in Oakcrest. He now is sillier than ever before. As his career, he creates bumper stickers which are so well-known, even Facebook is using them now! Way to go, Jake! Oh and his mom longer packs him a cute perfect little lunch anymore…Kim does.
Becca Irwin- Once accepted in NYU, Becca was the happiest little camper. She majored in fashion marketing and is the designer and CEO of her very own clothing line, entitled, “bec”. It’s the new hot style that is sooo 2020’s. Even though Leslie Pinero was rejected from America’s Next Top Model, she was hired as one of Becca’s first models to show off her trendy out fits. She is happily married to an amazing husband who she actually knew for a pretty long time. They have 2 girls and 2 boys, all who play softball and baseball. And just like their mommy, the girls are the best on their team, even if stupid Coach Raph and Coach Fresne didn’t notice it.
Dumebi Emetanjo- Du has gotten big…physically. She is a professional body builder and struts her stuff all day, lifting 800 pound weights and carrying 1 ton iron balls. As we know, Du never really was the extremely athletic or strong type of person. But back in her junior year of high school, she had the sudden urge to join Tilton Fitness Gym along with a few other friends, including Monica Mackleer, Leslie Pinero, and Scott Gibson. Together the 3 worked out and had fun but Du always took it to the next level. Before she knew it, she was a massive chocolate sundae-with extra dark chocolate fudge. She is now the proud owner of “Emetanjo Exercising- Do it Du’s Way.” She couldn’t be more happy with the results.
Courtney Sherman- The talented Courtney Sherman did not leave her talents and interests back in high school. She carried them through college and beyond. Sure she was a cute little band geek, but she was also quite the actress, especially back in Oakcrest when she and Leslie Pinero shared the stage together in numerous One Acts and Musicals. After college, she moved to L.A with her best friend Arthur to pursue her acting career. Together they made the perfect team and got two lead roles in the new T.V Series, “Band Buddies.” And you’ll never guess who the director of the show is- Mr. Tobias. But don’t think he stopped teaching band class at Oakcrest. No sir-ree, he’s still leading the marching Ambassadors to glory and Courtney comes home periodically to assist and help him. Since he can only drive around in his motorized scooter and oxygen tank, Courtney takes much care of him. And when Caitlin Mauk has big dinner parties at the White House, the first 2 guests are always Courtney and Mr. T.
Emily Capille/Emily Mehler- always being such a good listener, Emily Capille became a psychologist. Life was good for Emily. She sat on a big, comfy couch (not like the little TV show) and she listened to people’s problems and she solved them. But one little visit at work changed her life forever. She was sitting in her office, waiting for some crazy, mental case who was terrified of string cheese, to walk in for their weekly visit. But instead some very motherly looking woman entered the room trying to promote a Yoga class she was instructing. When she looked closely, Emily Capille realized it was her high school friend Emily Mehler who she had lost touch with. The two went to Yoga classes together and Emily Capille suddenly realized something- she wanted to be an Astronaut. Why an astronaut you may ask? Well, I have no idea. My guess is after hearing so many crazy people talk she went crazy herself but if you ever plan a trip up to space, maybe you can stop by and ask her why she chose to be one. And while you’re at it, get some Yoga instructing from Emily Mehler. Supposedly, it’s even more relaxing with no gravity, according to Leslie Pinero who has traveled up North many a time to take Emily Mehler’s galactic yoga class.
Alli McCarthy- Alli, one of the sweetest girls from Oakcrest, has not changed one bit. She still is constantly smiling and laughing and has yet to hurt a fly (well, minus the road kill she’s hit with her car in the past). She is now a tennis all-star and competes with Venus and Serena. Okay, just kidding. She stopped playing after high school. Maybe she and Leslie Pinero should’ve actually taken those lessons instead of just talking about them for so long. But she did however become a mom of three and all 3 of her kids will soon be learning to play tennis very well. She is a 2nd grade teacher in Mullica and yes, she is still best friends with Jackie Longo. We’re you really expecting anything different?
James Wilkes/Meghan Brennan- In the year 2020, J Dubs is a star athlete. He played football at Penn state, living his dream, and was quickly picked up by the NFL. He now took over Bret Favre’s spot on the best team ever- the Green Bay Packers…Green Bay all the way!” and has brought his team to victory. They have won 4 super bowls in a row in which Leslie Pinero has attended all. One time James looked up at the score board and saw Leslie’s face on the screen wearing her big, yellow cheese-head hat. James’ wife, Meghan Brennan, couldn’t be more proud of him. In fact, it was on Green Bay’s historical Lambeau Field where he popped the question. Meghan, now a physical therapist and high school field hockey coach, just like her mother, was overwhelmed and accepted. The happy couple has 4 children and a dog named Blake. Oh, and yes, Meghan still does those weird hick-up things every now and then.
Darrell Johnson- Darrell didn’t go to college but he did become the manager of Wawa. Alright, I lied. Darrell is actually very successful. After playing baseball at UCLA, Darrell made it to the major leagues and now plays as the catcher for the Phillies. His wife, who is obviously very crafty in making things, made him his very own baseball card. The two have 4 kids. Two boys and two girls. The lovely married couple visit regularly with good friends Dave and Megan and of course Darrell’s dear pal Zander as well, as their busy family friend, Leslie Pinero.
Niah Grimes- move out Tyra Banks and say hello to Niah Grimes. Niah skipped college. She knew she was too good, too beautiful, too unique to waste her precious time sitting in a class room, listening to some dull old man speak about some dumb educational topic. Niah was better than that. She knew her gorgeous looks could not go to waste. When she was 18, an adult, she made a promise to herself that she would not stop run-walking around until every single human living on this earth got a chance to see her beautiful, one of a kind face. First she left home to go to New York City with nothing but a pair of stilettos. She figured that if Bunje can go to Taiwan with nothing but a backpack for a month, she could make in NYC. Plus, she just assumed any guy would drop to his knees and give her anything she ever wanted with just a wink of an eye anyway. So off she went, strutting her heavenly body down the streets of New York. First she met some drug dealers and prostitutes that were jealous she was taking their corners, but then Hugh Hefner, who is still kicking strong, found her and brought her to California. She jumped right into the modeling business and quickly kicked boring old Tyra off of her Pedestal. She became a fashion diva and a super model. Now, she is the new host of America’s Next Top Model Pete D’Amico tried out, along with Andrew Cain and Leslie Pinero, but she rejected all of them. She is all alone with no husband and no kids. Okay she’s not all alone, she’s dating Michael Jackson’s son and she couldn’t be happier. The crazy, kooky, gorgeous couple is living in their Hollywood mansion and they are loving life.
Zander Peralejo- Here comes the next Stephen Spielberg! Zander and his brother Armando now own their own film production company. Together, they have already filmed 87 short films about zombies. But Zander has taken his career even father. He parties with all the top celebs and they gladly take part in his movies. His favorite actors have been Mike Myers, Miley Cyrus, Jessica Alba, Chris Rock, and Jim Carrey. Leslie Pinero has appeared as an extra in many of his films as well. For Bunje’s sake, he hired Johnny Depp to play one of his leads, but unfortunately, Mr. Depp just wasn’t good enough. Recently, one of his greatest accomplishments was being “Punk’d” by Ashton Kutcher in 2018 when they tricked Zander into thinking his pet iguana turned into Godzilla.
Laina Lusk- Laina, the poised, intelligent, sensitive Laina had always been destined for great things as soon as Mike Galli realized she was before him in class rank and created this large jealousy of her. Everyone knew she was one of the smartest when she was a genius in AP Gov. but her smarts never did diminished. She graduated from Brown University and went to law School at Yale. She is now an attorney and is living large. She is not married yet because this power-house is too busy making money, however, she somehow miraculously still finds time to own her own Chinese Market where she sells paper origami of all animals species in Costa Rica. One day, while she was in Costa Rica looking for a new species, she saw Leslie Pinero in a tree bird-watching up close. Laina is now in the process of writing her own novel on how to get good grades on AP tests and SATs. And to help modernize her teachings, her dear friend Mikey Henry is already started on creating a computer program for her to sell.
Joanna Zachowski- “Eat to live; Don’t live to eat.” These words came out of Jo’s mouth one fine day when she was training her best friend Leslie Pinero to eat less and exercise more so that her Thunder Thighs will reduce. This inspired her to become a personal trainer and fitness coach for top college athletes. She has written numerous books on dietary trips and healthy living. Like Danny Lang, she also continues her rowing but her more in a subtle surrounding. She and her hubby Jake live in a gorgeous house, over looking a lake where they row together. Occasionally Leslie pops by, sometimes riding along side them in a little kayak, but she always get’s tired and decides to give up and go get some ice cream or cheez-its- she never tells Jo though.
Emily Rheault- Emily purposely graduated from Rowan and became a Kindergarten teacher, just to see if her students could write her last name correctly. She also went to Rowan just because it sounded close to her name. Okay, though some of that is true, she did have other motives. She teaches her students many things about technology so that when they get to Oakcrest and join Media with Mr. Lockwood they won’t be scared and intimidated like she and Leslie Pinero once were. During recess, she takes all of the girls and trains them to be butch now so that when they go to Oakcrest they will also join the Softball team and have a winning streak just so Ms. Raph is happy.
Brittany Schmidt - After graduating from Rutgers, Brittany put her musical ability and intelligence aside as her and Leslie Pinero both tried out for America’s Next Top Model. Having the figure she was looking for, Niah kept Brittany and now she is living in Beverly Hills as a model for Cover Girl. She is married to her love, Matt, and they have 22 kids…whoopsie! Typo..they have 2 kids.
Jon Miller- Jon graduated from the school of Hard Knox. Okay, he actually graduated from Oklahoma State- I know pretty random. During his career as a Book publisher, he randomly was getting lunch at Taco- Bell where he randomly ordered a taco from a random cashier named, Leslie Pinero. He gave her a $2.00 tip because he felt bad and it reminded him of how he sat next to her at lunch but never really talk to her. Oh and he also is also a millionaire and donated most of his cash to Book Companies around the world.
Peter D’Amico- Pete graduated from Harvard. I bet at this point you’re waiting for me to say ‘just kidding’. But I’m not. He really did….okay just kidding he really didn’t. But, he did graduate from Ohio State and while on the plane ride home he sat next to a woman dress in a rain forest outfit. She was on a connection flight coming home from Costa Rica. After they talked for a few minutes, he realized it was Leslie Pinero- his kindergarten love. When he looked at her wrist he saw she was wearing the bracelet he made her back when they were 5 and the two instantly fell in love, got married and lived happily ever after. Yea, no I was just kidding again. The two did meet on the plane though and they shared a few laughs. Then like always, he tried to kiss her and she pulled away laughing even more. Then when they existed the plane he saw her run up to her gorgeous husband..okay last time, I was just kidding. She was not married at the time but the two are still very good friends.
Monica Mackleer- Monica, though slacked and was a bit lazy, got into college. In fact, she went to the University of Virginia with her other self, Leslie Pinero. There the two studied together every week and never accomplished anything but eat a lot of food. Some things never changed. But luckily, Monica was still very close with Du and she had a free membership and ‘did it Du’s way’ at Emetanjo Exercises. Although back at Oakcrest, Monica was ‘incaple of love’, she overcame this disability and married a gay (and when I say gay, I just mean happy ) wonderful man who she loved very much. She became a martial arts instructor. Okay, I’m fibbing. She won the lottery and became a millionaire and never had to actually work for the rest of her life. She had a son named Coby after her life-long pal, her dog. Then she had a girl who she named Leslie but then remembered how close that was to Lesbian and decided to name her Cassandra, after her favorite teacher back in high school.
Hannah Johnson/JoeCamp- Hannah went to TCNJ and majored in education. During her last year in college, she came back to her life mentor, Ms. Bunje, who she had an internship with. Hannah soon became an AP Lang English teacher and on the first day of school, she had her students hang up stars of all of their dreams and goals. Sounds familiar anyone? Hannah is happily married to JoeCamp. Though they only live with each other during the summer while she is not teaching. During the long fall, winter, and spring months, Joe is off living in a little log cabin he built himself over-looking Walden Pond. There he sits, alone, with nature. He has become one with the deer and the squirrels. The trees are his parents. The wind is his sister. The sun is his guidance and the moon is his peace. The rainstorm and the river are his brothers. The heron and the otter are his friends. Okay, enough with the crap, JoeCamp sits on a log all day and stares at water. He’s like the male version of Pocahontas. During his days and nights at Waldon Pond, he has written a book. A long book. A painfully, boring long book, just like that of Thoreau’s. One day he saw a trespasser in the woods, when he looked closely, it was just Leslie Pinero collecting leaves for her scientific discovery.
Cassandra Bunje- okay, the moment everyone has been waiting for…where is Ms. Bunje in the year 2020??!?! Well, unfortunately, that person who already predicted her future was right. She already died years ago. Just kidingggggg! Don’t get mad, I was kidding in everyone’s..you knew it was coming! Anyway, Bunje is still a teacher at Oakcrest, where she teaches hundreds and hundreds of young aspiring students but they never replace her first AP kids. All of us remain in her hearts forever. She has already reached enlightenment, through our help, and she and Mrs. Rock are the best of friends. She is the god mother to all three of Mrs. Rock’s children and she owns 4 dogs and 20 cats. That’s right. Ms. Bunje turns into one of those crazy old ladies who lives with a bunch of cats. Alright just kidding again. Putting all jokes aside, Cassandra Bunje continues throughout her life, teaching everyone she encounters. Whether she spends years with them and teaches them quality AND quantity, or even if she sees them in Acme and talks to them for 1 minute, somehow Bunje’s way of leaving a lasting impact on everyone she meets never seems to leave her. It’s apparent she has left a huge impact on all of her AP kids as you can see they have all achieved high honors and happiness. Because of Bunje, ALL of her AP kids have been guided down their own path to enlightenment. And every time the school year comes to a close, every single one of them comes to visit her in June and keeps her posted on their lives. She is never forgotten and will be with us forever.
See? It’s amazing how everybody is helping somebody. Who ever said we’re never gonna see each other after high school was an idiot. By the looks of it, we’re all going to stay pretty close and by the way fate is turning out, we all are going to be a success in our own ways. So like Bunje said, it’s not a good-bye…it’s just a see-ya later. <3
I love you ALLLLL AP Langers!! And of course, you, Ms. Bunje!!
Sunday, June 1, 2008
Never Say Goodbye
WOW.
I wrote my post title first today (I don't normally do that--with anything. College papers, OP's or anything else that needs a title. I always feel like it pigeonholes my writing). This blog, though, is different than most things I write, and as such, it deserves its own moment of "newness." This is the last blog of the year--and the last blog you will ever do as an AP Langer. While most of you are now doing that fist-pump thing in the air that you do when you're thrilled about something, I am sort of trying to post through a watery screen of unshed tears at this prospect.
Last year, the end of the year was tough--my first year at Oakcrest with a bunch of kids that were different than any I had known at Central--it was tough to let them go. This year, though, this year might be tougher yet. I feel as though we have been through one of the most arduous journeys together, and when I look back at the twists and turns of the road we traveled I am humbled and awed by the experience.
I will save most of my internal musings about this for my final OP (Yes, Alli--I know I haven't read my 3rd MP one yet)and just get on with your task for this, our final blog together as an AP Lang family.
This week, my pumpkins, I would like you to use your voice and leave your mark here, on this page. You walked into 204 10 months ago not knowing what to expect or what you should think. You will leave with--well, I guess that is the question of the hour. What will you leave with--what have you learned, what have you experienced? What was your favorite day, your favorite lesson, your finest moment that you can recall? Are you different now then you were then? Better? Worse? Indifferent? What did your junior year do for you? What are your hopes for your senior year? Is there anything you want to say to your friends? Yourself? You can say whatever you want--just, please don't end your post with saying "goodbye." Because, it's not really "Goodbye"--it's more like, "See you later."
I wrote my post title first today (I don't normally do that--with anything. College papers, OP's or anything else that needs a title. I always feel like it pigeonholes my writing). This blog, though, is different than most things I write, and as such, it deserves its own moment of "newness." This is the last blog of the year--and the last blog you will ever do as an AP Langer. While most of you are now doing that fist-pump thing in the air that you do when you're thrilled about something, I am sort of trying to post through a watery screen of unshed tears at this prospect.
Last year, the end of the year was tough--my first year at Oakcrest with a bunch of kids that were different than any I had known at Central--it was tough to let them go. This year, though, this year might be tougher yet. I feel as though we have been through one of the most arduous journeys together, and when I look back at the twists and turns of the road we traveled I am humbled and awed by the experience.
I will save most of my internal musings about this for my final OP (Yes, Alli--I know I haven't read my 3rd MP one yet)and just get on with your task for this, our final blog together as an AP Lang family.
This week, my pumpkins, I would like you to use your voice and leave your mark here, on this page. You walked into 204 10 months ago not knowing what to expect or what you should think. You will leave with--well, I guess that is the question of the hour. What will you leave with--what have you learned, what have you experienced? What was your favorite day, your favorite lesson, your finest moment that you can recall? Are you different now then you were then? Better? Worse? Indifferent? What did your junior year do for you? What are your hopes for your senior year? Is there anything you want to say to your friends? Yourself? You can say whatever you want--just, please don't end your post with saying "goodbye." Because, it's not really "Goodbye"--it's more like, "See you later."
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Writer's Cramp
ARRRGGGHH!!! The frustration mounts, pencils fly around the room and no dogs get treats when this happens to me!! I am, unequivocally, blocked.
SO, it shall be a fairly easy blog this week, since the one about love is not ready to move from the far recesses of my brain to my fingers. Some absence of firing synapses, I suppose, but for some reason I can't make my ideas connect in a way that makes sense to me. I suck. Sorry.
So, for this week, now that we are knee-deep in one of the most philosophical books in a high-school curriculum, I would like to know, in all honesty, what you are getting out of reading Siddhartha. You don't have to love it (though I kind of hope you do a little), but tell me something that it makes you think about in connection with your own life.
You don't have to give it glowing reviews, but try to keep it positive because even if you are miserable reading it, something good may come of even that.
I am not going to give you a word count, but I am counting on you not to slack. Don't let me down.
SO, it shall be a fairly easy blog this week, since the one about love is not ready to move from the far recesses of my brain to my fingers. Some absence of firing synapses, I suppose, but for some reason I can't make my ideas connect in a way that makes sense to me. I suck. Sorry.
So, for this week, now that we are knee-deep in one of the most philosophical books in a high-school curriculum, I would like to know, in all honesty, what you are getting out of reading Siddhartha. You don't have to love it (though I kind of hope you do a little), but tell me something that it makes you think about in connection with your own life.
You don't have to give it glowing reviews, but try to keep it positive because even if you are miserable reading it, something good may come of even that.
I am not going to give you a word count, but I am counting on you not to slack. Don't let me down.
Monday, May 19, 2008
The Path
Today in class we talked a bit about choosing your path; how you choose, what motivates those choices etc.
One of the most important things, I think, about the notion of choices and decisions and such is the fact that, through each choice we make, we, albeit unconsciously, undergo a process of education. We learn something. Whether it be about ourselves, our friends, our loved ones etc, we learn. Sometimes, the paths we choose take us somewhere dark and foreboding; in which case we learn we never want to return there. Other times, our choices transport us to a place of whimsy and euphoria and bliss. When that happens, we want to take meticulous notes on how we may someday return to that same place. (I am speaking metaphorically, here)
Either way, there is both direct and indirect knowledge gained from the decisions we make about the paths we follow. And, as with every bit of education, there is always a test. Again with the tests!
This week, I would like you to think about a time in your life where you were forced to undergo a test of your character due to a choice you made. Or, if you are poised on the precarious precipice of decision now, you can make a prediction about what you are about to experience. What do you think this choice, this path said, says or will say about you? What did you or will you learn? What do you want to learn?
(450 words/75pts)
One of the most important things, I think, about the notion of choices and decisions and such is the fact that, through each choice we make, we, albeit unconsciously, undergo a process of education. We learn something. Whether it be about ourselves, our friends, our loved ones etc, we learn. Sometimes, the paths we choose take us somewhere dark and foreboding; in which case we learn we never want to return there. Other times, our choices transport us to a place of whimsy and euphoria and bliss. When that happens, we want to take meticulous notes on how we may someday return to that same place. (I am speaking metaphorically, here)
Either way, there is both direct and indirect knowledge gained from the decisions we make about the paths we follow. And, as with every bit of education, there is always a test. Again with the tests!
This week, I would like you to think about a time in your life where you were forced to undergo a test of your character due to a choice you made. Or, if you are poised on the precarious precipice of decision now, you can make a prediction about what you are about to experience. What do you think this choice, this path said, says or will say about you? What did you or will you learn? What do you want to learn?
(450 words/75pts)
Monday, May 5, 2008
What is your Lyrical Philosophy?
I know we talked about personal philosophies a few weeks ago; guidelines you all use to determine your various paths and inform all your decisions, and some of you had some interesting things to say about that. Some others had a hard time trying to put into words exactly what their guiding principles are. I don't blame you--it's pretty hard to do.
Many of you use music as a gateway. To sanity, to serenity, to solace and/or to solitude. Music, to many of you, is an escape from the harsh realities of teenage life.
So, now it is also going to be a tool in which you come to a greater understanding of how you see the world, and how you see yourself.
Think about all the music you love to listen to. Specifically, think about the lyrics to songs you love. Now, I want you to pick one or two songs that adequately encapsulate how you feel about life, your life. Of course, like a quote, nothing can COMPLETELY "sum up" your entire life--I understand that. But many songs, either through explicit or implied messages in lyrics, can at least provide a concrete example of either what you want out of life, what you want out love and how you want to be perceived, taken, understood etc.
So, your task this week is to tell us about a song, copy a few of the refrains/chorus/passages, and explicate their meaning(s) to you.
Try to pick ones that have some depth and that will provide a deeper understanding of your innate beliefs. (450-500 words/70pts)
Many of you use music as a gateway. To sanity, to serenity, to solace and/or to solitude. Music, to many of you, is an escape from the harsh realities of teenage life.
So, now it is also going to be a tool in which you come to a greater understanding of how you see the world, and how you see yourself.
Think about all the music you love to listen to. Specifically, think about the lyrics to songs you love. Now, I want you to pick one or two songs that adequately encapsulate how you feel about life, your life. Of course, like a quote, nothing can COMPLETELY "sum up" your entire life--I understand that. But many songs, either through explicit or implied messages in lyrics, can at least provide a concrete example of either what you want out of life, what you want out love and how you want to be perceived, taken, understood etc.
So, your task this week is to tell us about a song, copy a few of the refrains/chorus/passages, and explicate their meaning(s) to you.
Try to pick ones that have some depth and that will provide a deeper understanding of your innate beliefs. (450-500 words/70pts)
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Kids First
15 Days and Counting until the Lang Exam. No worries.
After that, we have approximately 4 weeks left together before you are on your way to a fun-filled and relaxing summer.
So, while it is true I have plans for you, I would like to know what kinds of things YOU would like to do with that time. (No, Zander, Ultimate Frisbee, Pokemon tournaments or cutting my class are NOT viable options.)
Make your list, check it twice and I promise to take it all under advisement and plan accordingly. Have at it, poppets!
After that, we have approximately 4 weeks left together before you are on your way to a fun-filled and relaxing summer.
So, while it is true I have plans for you, I would like to know what kinds of things YOU would like to do with that time. (No, Zander, Ultimate Frisbee, Pokemon tournaments or cutting my class are NOT viable options.)
Make your list, check it twice and I promise to take it all under advisement and plan accordingly. Have at it, poppets!
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