Monday, November 26, 2007
"Dear Mama..."
So, coincidentally, I was thinking about the idea of mothers the other day. It is a concept that seems almost foreign to me based solely on personal experience. I mean, I have a mother--someone who went through "hours of pain just to give me life!"-- but I think there is a fundamental difference between having a mother and having a mom. Do you? Myself, I had a mother. If you think there is a difference, what do you think it is? What is your definition of a mother? A mom? What is your earliest recollection of your mother (or other maternal figure)? Girls, do you want to be a mom? Boys, are there certain qualities in girls that you associate with the idea of moms? Do you want to be like your mom? In what way? If there was one thing you could tell your mother on this blog that she didn't know before, what would it be? (400words/50pts)
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There is a huge difference between having a mother and having a mom. A mother is someone who gave you life. A mom is someone who is there for you all the time, for the good times and the bad, whether you want her to be or not. A mom does not have to be the person who gave birth to you. Whether your real mom, adoptive mom, or the lady who lives down the street, a mom is whoever you see as your maternal figure.
I think the earliest recollection I have of my mom is when she picked me up from day care. I was three years old, and it was the first time I got a time out in day care before. Before we left, the babysitter told my mom that I was in time out for not sharing toys with another little boy. She got mad at me when we got in the car, and I started to cry. But then she took me to Custard Castle, and got me a kiddie-sized chocolate ice cream, which has been my favorite since then. I was so happy that she wasn't mad anymore, and we ate our ice cream together at one of the red picnic tables, with me on her lap. That's the first memory I have of my mom.
I keep going back and forth on the whole "being a mom" thing. On one hand, I want to spend my whole life traveling the world, doing the things I want and not tied down with a family. On the other hand, I want to be a mom, with a big family and have the big family get-togethers like my family has now.
There are certain parts of my mom that I want to have. I want her patience most of all. I don't know how she stays sane in a house with two teenage girls and two young boys. We are always at each other's throats, fighting about something or other. She loses her cool once in a while, but it's less frequent than you'd expect. And I want to be able to love my kids unconditionally. I know everyone says they do and that "when you have kids, you'll know," but is it really possible for someone to love a baby, who hasn't experienced anything and has no personality yet? I don't want to sound cold-hearted, but I think only certain people can love someone unconditionally.
As for this last question, I have been avoiding it. Honestly, I don't even know what to say. I think I would tell my mom that I don't trust her with stuff dealing with certain parts of my life because all she does is blow it out of proportion. I know my mom only wants the best for me and never wants to see me get hurt, but I need to be able to figure things out for myself without her sheltering me my whole life. I would love to be able to tell her anything in the world, but I can't.
Moms. Where to begin? Well let me start with the difference. Personally I believe or have this vision that a mom is a generalization. Your mom can either be cool, or funny, or dorky or hot. Now a mother is a more disciplined person to be. Its kind reminds me of when my brother gets in trouble and instead of saying A.J. my parents call him Arthur. So in a way, if you understand what I mean, a mother, almost is a bad thing to me. Now another one is mommy. My all time favorite. Now as I get older and say this to my mom she gets a little weirder out and just laughs but when your five and have those cute puppy dog eyes and that fat quivering lower lip, the word mommy can get you almost anything you want. My mom is someone I look up to in a big way. She works hard and does everything she can to have nice things and be able to give my brother and sister and I the best life possible. Not only with materialistic things but with the care and love she gives us. Now my brother seems to get a little more care and love than the rest of us but that’s a whole other story. See he is thee baby of the family and even though he is ten, in her eyes, he still is the baby. Wait, I meant to say my moms eyes. In my family if one of us ever refer to my mom as her or she, my dad gets mad, like it is disrespectful. I didn’t understand it so much when I was little but now that I am older I can kind of understand a little more. My mom does a lot for me and my siblings, in fact she does anything we ask. As long as our rooms are clean and there are no dishes in the sink or useless junk on the counters. I admire my mom and want to be just like her when I get older. I cannot wait to be a mom. I want to have a boy first and then a girl. I think being a mom will be fun though I think I will be that sucker who gives there kids everything. Hehe. Not on purpose but my mom did that to me so I think I will be that same when I get older. My mom already told me that my first child will be spoiled by her and I don’t doubt it.
Though I want to be like my mom, in a way I don’t. My mom is very critical at times, sometimes a little too. I don’t think she ever means to hurt my feelings but when I look to her for her opinion, its not exactly what I want to hear. My problem is that I am so wrapped up in impressing her and making sure I do everything right and do nothing to disappoint her, that when she does say something about me or my life, it gets to me. I really don’t think she means to but know that I am getting older I am starting to voice my opinion. Like the other day I was trying on dresses and I really liked this one, I had it all picked out and my dad had approved. I tried it on when she got to the store and not one positive thing came out of her mouth. It hurt me bad and I put the dress back even though I really wanted it. I started to cry and my dad got mad like I was hurting her feelings but he had no idea what was even said. I told her how I felt to an extent without being disrespectful, and that’s when I think she realized that she hurt me. She offered to buy me that dress but I didn’t want it because I knew that when I would wear it I would think of everything she had said. So yea sometimes you can be a little critical and IT HURTS!!!
I agree with Hannah as well. I wish I could have my moms patience. I seriously don’t know how she is still sane. I mean running a family, a household, bills, a job, and some how finds time for herself. I wish I could be exactly like that but I know it wont ever happen because I am the most impatient person.
1 a: a female parent b (1): a woman in authority; specifically: the superior of a religious community of women (2): an old or elderly woman 3: maternal tenderness or affection.
This is the definition of mother as seen in the Merriam-Webster Dictionary. Yes, one can say there is a difference between a mom and a mother. I guess I really don't know the actual difference because I never really thought about it and I didn't have any personal experience with a difference. Here is my idea of the difference between a mother and a mom that I took some time to think about. Most kids call their female parent mom and some call them mother. So I guess everyone has a different meaning for mom and mother. Myself I see mom as a friendlier loving parent. And when you say mother I see a stricter parent, but still with love and affection. It is said a maternal figure can never not love their own child, so this is why I say both a mom and a mother are both loving. My definition of a mother is a disciplined maternal person that strictly enforces her maternal being. And my definition for a mom is a more loving, understanding, maternal person that is just the overall happy person. Mom also comes as a nickname to other friends moms that one feels close to. So a mom is more friendly term for someone one looks up to as a maternal figure. I guess the point I am trying to get across is mother is a more proper term, so a mother is just a more stern being. My earliest recollection of my mother is when I was very very young. I remember every time I needed her she was there for me. She put up with everything I did, even my loud crying when I was a baby, even though she probably wanted to go crazy. She was always so understanding and loving. In particular I remember how she always said I was a good kid, so that just reflects how she raised me good right from the start. I associate girls with the idea of moms by how they treat others and how they would treat their kids. Overall, I think if they are a very happy and loving person they have the possibility of being a good mom. But yes, that can be false. The thing that I hope I can carry down from my mom is that when I have kids that I can always be there for them and love them like my mom loves me. And I also hope to be able to put aside time for my kids like she does when I need her. There really isn't anything that I would have to tell her that she probably doesn't know, but here is maybe one thing. The one thing is that I am getting older and after next year I am leaving for college and she has to realize I won’t be around for her to always try and keep everything down pat. Some things that she already knows is that even though we get in stupid arguments and fights, I still love her even more than before. Also that she is a great inspiration in my life along with my dad and that I would do anything for her.
As I was writing this no one responded to the blog, but when I refreshed and finished there was. So I guess I share some similarities with both Hannah and Devon. Some of the similarities are how my mom stays sane in my house with me and my brother. And the similarity with Devon is we both see a mother as a stricter maternal being. And it is kind of weird because after writing mine and then reading theirs there were a lot of different things that matched up.
I guess there really is a difference between a mother and a mom. I completely agree with Hannah that a mother is someone who gave birth to you and that a mom is someone that is with you throughout your life, good or bad. I don’t really see anyone else being my mom, it’s maybe because I don’t really see any other adult as my mom. It’s true what Hannah said, whether your neighbor or a lady down the street, if you see them as a maternal person, she’s your mom.
My earliest recollection of my mom is probably when I was on a plane with her and my sister, Sandy, who was about one or two years old at that time. My sister was crying and and I just sat there complaining about the nasty mint chocolate thing, not the one they put under your pillow in a hotel but the ones at the stores that are about as round as the top of a cup. I bet you, my mom had the hugest headache that moment!
Of course I want to be a mom, I’ve always wanted a happy BIG family of my own. There would be a lot of aunts and uncles around, the whole family being happy together, like it is for my mom. I know I’d raise up a pretty good kid if I were a mom, they’d be adorable and respectable in their own way. Thinking about it, I really don’t want to be alone for the rest of my life with no kids, when they grow up they’d have kids and I would be able to smile and say, “Wow, I’ve lived my life up to the fullest!”
I don’t exactly want to be like my mom, but I do admire the fact that she’s been with me throughout my life and that she’s always there for me. She’s a great mom and I love her, but I want to raise my kids a bit different than she did to me and my siblings. I would, however, want to cook like her, her cooking is amazing and it just makes your mouth water if you smell in the aroma all the way from your room. It’s amazing and I want to be able to cook great asian food for my kids one day so they’d be big and strong. My mom also knows how to sew and she can do so many things that I want to learn how to do. I admire her more than anything and I also admire her for all the hardships she’s been through in the Vietnam War, she has been strong and steady.
I want to tell my mom that I love her and that she will always be my hero and my one and only mẹ (mom in Vietnamese, I don't really call her mom^^).
Well I’ve never really stopped to think about the difference between a mom and a mother. I find myself calling my mom “mom” most often. I think this is more of a term of endearment as looking up to someone and respecting them as a maternal figure. My true mom has been my only maternal figure so I have never really called anyone other than my mom “mom” but I do agree with Hannah that whomever you see as that maternal figure, whether it be just some lady down the street, then that is your mom and it doesn’t matter if you aren’t blood related to her, she can still be your mom. When I get really mad at my mom or something she did that irritated me I tend to call her “mother”. I see mother, as Danny said, as a strict figure enforcing unpleasant rules. And there are the occasional time I am trying to suck up to my mom to get something that I want and in those situations I tend to call my mom “mommy”. I guess mommy has more of a childhood connection, it seems to have a childish denotation. But I guess a mother, if that’s all you call her all the time, would be more of the person who gave birth to you, as you said Bunje. Someone who really isn’t there for your emotional needs. On the other hand, just saying mom when compared to mother gives me a warm feeling. A mom is someone who looks out for your feelings, put your well being before hers, and cares and loves you unconditionally. However, I do think that you need a little mix of both a mom and a little bit of mother to be a successful mother. There are those moms who try to be the “best friend” and those that just strictly enforce the rules. I don’t agree with either extreme, but I think a happy medium is necessary, and that’s how I hope to be to my own children, if I have them. I’ve always pictured myself married with kids but lately I can not stand kids! I hate their annoying tantrums and how dependent they are others, which I think could possibly just be my age. I have thought it would be better to just worry about myself and not have to worry about other individuals. I do however want to love someone that is part of me, who shares half of my genes because I think that is truly a miracle and I can see how much pride and joy children bring to their parents, something else I think we would all be lucky to experience.
My earliest childhood memory with my mom is a hard one. I think my first recollection of my mom would be when I was three years old around Christmas time. My mom and dad were trying to take a picture of me for our Christmas/Holiday card and I remember my dad being outside getting ready to take the pictures and my mom standing right next to me making me laugh so my dad could capture that Kodak moment. I still remember her warm embrace after it was over and sitting on her lap at our table eating a homemade Christmas sugar cookie with her, something I thought was such a treat.
I guess it depends on my mood whether or not I want to be like my mom. Of course it’s always aggravating to hear “you and your mom are so alike!” But, really I think I would be blessed to be like my mom. She has been there for me through everything and has been such a good role model. We tend to argue a lot but only because we are soo similar. I guess if I had to tell my mom something in this blog that I haven’t already told her, it would be that I am truly proud of her. She has had to deal with some really tough things in her past and has stayed so strong through it all. And even though we fight, I love her to death. I wish she knew how much she really does make a difference in everything I do. The morals she has instilled in me have always, and will always, guide my actions in every aspect of my life whether I am willing to admit it at the time or not.
I didn't really like my mom til about the beginning sophomore year. Hahaha that sounds mean...I guess I mean that I didn't actually really let her into everything going on in my life until then. But now that my mom and I are close I can't really understand why I was so annoyed with her for no reason before. I think all girls go through a period where they just don't like their mom and they argue a lot. Luckily that's all over for me, but that's no to say that we don't argue about stupid stuff sometimes. My mom and I are SO much alike though so our fights usually happen the same exact way: we don't agree with each other, we both think we're right, we both try to get the last word, and then we both forgive each other 20 minutes later because we can't hold grudges against people. I suck at holding grudges. Even when I WANT to not talk to her for the rest of the night I always end up doing it, but that's a whole different story. I guess I'm glad for that.
I think a mother is someone who is just there for you physical needs...the usual necessities that a kid growing up needs- food, shelter, blahblahblah. A mom is more loving and is not only there for you to give you all of the stuff you need in order to live, but is there for you emotionally. A mom is able to give you advice and always make you feel better when you're upset. I definitely have a mom.
My earliest memory of my mom has to do with ice cream, just like Hannah's earliest memory. It was my first ice cream cone, a vanilla softserve on one of those annoying carboard cones, with rainbow sprinkles on top. My cousin was down from PA and we all driving past the Dairy Queen when I was screamed out, "DAIRY TRAINNNN!" They always bring that up in the car whenever we go past a Dairy Queen now. I don't know why I called it that but I'm probably not going to ever live it down. Anyway, my mom told me I was "big girl enough" for an ice cream cone. Apparently I wasn't though because I got it all over my face. I think more of it ended up on my favorite purple hippopotamous dress than in my mouth. The whole pile of vanilla fell off the second she handed it to me and I was just eating it out of my palms. My mom laughed, and got my a cup to put my handful of ice cream in. But I remember being really happy and excited, and sitting with my mom, aunt, and cousin on the red picnic benches.
I want to be a mom (DEFINITELY not any time soon though.) Or I think I do anyway. I don't know, I can't really imagine it right now when I'm so NOT ready to be a mom. But I would want to be like my mom. She strikes a good balance between being a mom and a mother. I like her being involved in my life because she helps me through so much.
When Devon said that her dad doesn't like it when she calls her mom "her" my dad is the EXACT SAME WAY. I usually call my mom "her" when we're in a fight, and my dad always yells at me to not say "her." That's really weird, actually, because I never understood it either, Dev. I guess I'm starting to understand it a little better now that I'm older now too because he just wants me to respect her when I talk about her.
Even though I said all of that, there is one thing that my mom doesn't know that happened recently. I was in my parents room watching tv one day when they weren't home, and I opened "the picture drawer" (it's pretty much just a really disorganized drawer full of pictures from all different time periods.) I don't know why I did, not expecting to find anything, I guess because I was bored. Anyway, I found this little book in there under some stuff and I took it out, not knowing what it was. I opened it and started reading entries and entries of a journal my mom kept when she was in college. I read some stuff that I never expected to read (some of it including times she smoked pot?!) The first thing I wanted to do was go and yell at her when she came home for it, but I realized that it was in the past, and that that was basically the hippie Stockton party-up time period. I judged her immediently, I guess because she's my mom. I know this is selfish, but sometimes I forget that my mom had a whole life before she had me and that I wasn't part of it for a good twenty-something years. All of this happened about a week ago, and I still want to tell her that I read it (for some crazy reason.) Danielle thinks that I shoudn't tell her I read it because it will make her feel weird that her daughter read everything she did in college. I still don't know though.
Oh God, if anyone should know the difference between a mother and a mom it should be me. There is definitely a huge difference between the two and it seems that Bunje already realizes this fact. I don’t have a relationship with my mother. And I call he mother because she is not a mom. A mother is someone who gave birth to you, plain and simple. A mom is a woman who cares about you, who loves you, you is always there for you, and also whom you can consider a best friend. I once had a mom, but now I only have a mother. She and my dad got divorced a few years ago and once that was final, she put me second, ya know, after he other boyfriends and whatnot. Then my dad got remarried to a woman named Beverly and that didn’t work out either. I did consider Bevie a mom to me. She treated me like her real daughter, more than my mother ever has. Since she and my dad aren’t together anymore I don’t really talk to her, nor do I want to. I found out what kind of person she really is, but that is besides the point of this blog. Anyway I guess the earliest memory of my mother would have to be when I was about 5 years old. My dad, mother, Jamie (my half sissy), and I went out on our boat and went to this hang out spot for boats called the dredge. The memory is sort of stupid because it has no really meaning, it was just a happy time with my mother and the rest of my family of course. That was when she was happy and easygoing. Back then she didn’t put me second. I was put first, the way it should be and I felt like I can’t even really remember a clear time when I was that to her. I was too young to know. But from my Grammy’s stories, I was. I was, not anymore. I definitely don’t want to be like her when I become a mom. She is the complete opposite of what a mom is. I’m going to be there for my children and put them first, not second how I was. I want the best for them. I want to know them inside and out. I want them to feel loved. And I don’t want them to go through what I had to endeavor. No kid should. If I could tell her one thing it would be this: I have a star made out of tin foil hanging from a string in room 204 with something about you written on it. It says: My mother has told me that I’m not worth her time. That’s something that I have to live with, but I’m not going to let it affect me. I really think it has made me stronger. Every time I sit in my seat and look up at that space object with the name BEC written in purple sharpie starring back at me, I’m going to be proud of myself for not listening to her. Bunje I have to say that the whole star idea is pretty cool.
Now for someone else’s blog:
I really wish I had a relationship with my mother as Jo and Devon do. Having a mother is something that most people take for granted because they don’t know what it’s like when you don’t have one in your life anymore. I hate to be all down on the whole mom subject, but I’m only going off what I know. They’re just lucky to have a mom that cares so much about them.
House is to home as mother is to mom. There’s a difference between a house and a home. A house is a building that you can live in. A home brings you warmth and comfort as soon as you walk into the door. A home, as opposed to a house, makes you feel happy. It gives you a sense of security and you love it. Although the dictionary believes “mother” and “mom” are the same, I think there’s a huge difference. Your mother is the woman who conceived you and gave birth to you. Your mom is so much more than that. She’s the one who raised you, loved you, fed and clothed you. She’s the one who was there for your first dance recital, sitting in the front row cheering you on. She’s the one who kissed your knee after you scraped it at the park.
I don’t know my earliest recollection of my mom. I vaguely remember going on vacation and I obviously don’t remember being born. I remember her dressing me up as the dish washer repair man and me knocking on the door, thinking I had completely fooled my dad. I sat in the kitchen clinking away at the dish washer, so proud of myself for being an outstanding actress, and my mom telling me he had no idea. I remember our Easter egg hunts and our Thanksgiving treasure hunts. I remember my birthday parties and the Christmas shows we put on every year. I remember the dance recitals we put on in the kitchen for Father’s Day. My mom has done so many wonderful things for me and I remember as much as mentally possible.
I 100% want to be a mom. Maybe there’s not a doubt in my mind because I see how much my mom loves having us. I’m scared I’ll have bratty kids or kids that are unhealthy. But the possibility of something going wrong doesn’t outweigh the joy that being a mom would bring to me. Honestly, I want to be exactly like my mom. She’s strict when she needs to be. She’s laid back at almost all the right times. She’s perfect to talk to. She has the best sense of humor. She always seems to understand where I’m coming from. Unlike Danny and Devon, I don’t see my mother as a strict figure. I don’t think there’s anything I could tell my mom that she doesn’t already know. She’s one of my best friends (as dorky as that sounds) and I cherish the relationship that we have. I just hope I can be as amazing of a mother as her.
Truthfully, I thank my mom everyday that I have her. Not only did she give me life, but she provides for me and is there for me when I need her. That is a real mom. You cannot just wake up one day and write "Mom" on a name tag, stick it on your shirt, and expect to be the best mom ever. It takes work and experience to be a good mom. Of course, I am the third and youngest child, so my mom had plenty of experience by the time I came along, but my mom had my brother when she was only 18. She must have been so scared to be pregnant in high school and I admire her for how well my brothers and I turned out. Of course we had our father to help, but we always need that maternal figure in our lives. To me, a mom is whoever you choose to be. It doesn't even have to be the person who raised you, but if you feel that that person is a motherly figure towards you, then, by all means, call her your mom. It's your decision and your feelings.
The earliest recollection I have of my mother is waking up from my naps everyday while she stayed home with me when I was little. I would fall asleep to Barney and wake up to General Hospital. Then my brothers would be home from school and the house would return to its rowdy state that it is usually in. I miss those days. Falling asleep in my mother's arms was the best feeling I had growing up. I felt safe, warm, and loved. Having that feeling growing up has made me have such a good relationship with my mom. She isn't corny like some moms, she's cool. She is so fun to be around, it's like she's my best friend. I tell her so much and I know I can trust her with whatever I say and I can always get advice from her when I need it. I've watched one of my friends have such a bad relationship with her mom and I couldn't imagine living like that. I need my mom. Yes, I have my dad, but my mom is everything to me and at this point in my life, I need her.
I cannot wait to be a mom. Everything about having kids is amazing to me. Of course I am waiting until I am like 25, but I can't wait until that day comes. Just the feeling I get around my mom excites me because I want my kids to have that same feeling. I want them to admire me, come to me with their problems, and I will love them with all my heart. Would I do anything different from my mom? No. I came out pretty alright I think and if I can get them out in the real world safe and sound, I have done my job.
As I am reading everyone else's blogs, we all have the same thoughts, but I agree with Hannah about the mother giving birth to you and the mom being with you through out your life. I like to think of it like that because I like to think that I have a mom, not a mother.
I have nothing I have to say to my mom over this blog because I tell her everything. But as much as I thank her, I don't say I love you enough. So Mom, I love you. With all my mind and heart and I thank you for everything you have done in my 17 years and one month of living.
Okay, I have to repost to comment on someone's blog. Two things: I 100% agree with Megan's analogy of house and home. A house is where you live, a home is where there's love. And two, Niah baby, PLEASE never call me Hannah Montana again. :)
I have a Mom. I had a father. I do not have a dad. This is the simplest way to explain my parental status. I have thought, said, expressed, etc. this idea throughout my entire life and it’s so comforting to know that I’m not the only one to feel this way about a parent. My Mom is a mom. She is there for me, cares for me, loves unconditionally, bla, bla, bla…I honestly feel she is the perfect mom and not because she has the typical qualities of a “mom” but she also has so many imperfections that really have helped me become who I am. She is not perfect in the sense that she is drop dead gorgeous, or that she is willing to make dinner every night, or that she cleans all the time, or that she is always sweet and cute because that is definitely NOT perfect to me. The perfect mom has to have the complete package. Sure, those obvious aspects listed above are added into this package, however, a mom needs to be mean, cautious, annoying, embarrassing, everything you dislike about a mom because that is how I get the full experience of a mom. Some people may completely disagree with me but I, in a weird way, sometimes like when my mom yells at me because I know she is being real and a human being for that mother. Those “Leave it to Beaver” moms are so typical but so not real. They are not moms. There’s obviously a difference between a mother and a mom and I’m going to use my father as an example. There was a man who was married to my mom and they “were in-love” (how? I have no idea) and then eventually I was created, within the span of 9 months, of course. Then, my father left when I was 6 months old and to this day, he has no role, no relationship, and no importance in my life. He was my FATHER. He never was and never will be my DAD. Now, here’s where things get a little tricky. I know I’m drifting slightly away from mothers and moms, but this is my idea of it all and it’s all related, regardless of the sex. My grandfather, who is 85, is my dad. No, this is not some twisted Jerry Springer crap, I honestly look to him as a dad, not a father (that role was taken and wasted), but a dad. He has helped raise me, taught me more then I thought was possible, has always been there to talk to, and has loved me unconditionally…sound familiar? It should. These, once again, are the typical qualities that are in a mom and a dad, and yes, just like my mom, my dad (Pop-Pop) has his moments where he gives his little life’s lessons and lecture’s and shows his concern. It’s all in the package.
Personally, I would love to be a mom and honesty I am so excited for the day I get to hold my very own child in my arms for the first time. That, of course, doesn’t mean I’m going to run out and get pregnant, though being a mom, not a mother, is always something I look forward to in my future. And the only way my children are being raised, is at least with a mom, hopefully if everything works out, they will have a loving dad along side, though they will never just have a mother. I will always be there for them, care for them, and love them unconditionally…yup, that’s right, I’m going to have those typical qualities in my package, as well as all the ones any mom would possess, including the very popular one where moms scream and yell over absolutely nothing. In other words, yea, I want to be like my mom. Maybe the yelling and all will be reduced to a minimum but I’m sure I’ll still yell. I usually tell my mom a lot of what I think and feel but I guess if there’s anything she’s never actually “listened” to (for example, if I have said this and she HEARD me, but probably never LISTENED), it’s that I really, honestly, whole-heartedly appreciate EVERYTHING she has done, is doing, and will do for me. She is the true definition of My Perfect MOM.
Bec, I completely see where you’re coming from and I feel very similar to you. I know you already know this because we always have talks about your MOTHER and my FATHER but seriously, didn’t this blog just relate to us perfectly, well you especially. You know you seriously have the best dad in the world so, seriously, who needs two parents? I think you and I have grown up into quite good little women with only one lol =)
Mothers. A very important figure in everyone's life, whether she's around today to hear that or not. Technically speaking, you wouldn't be alive without your mother. But I think you would be metaphorically "alive" without a mom, either.
Mother and Mom; the words are almost synonymous. But they each hide a subtle meaning that makes them different. "Mother" seems to be a very technical word, and represents the actual being of a mother: the one who carried you around in her stomach for nine months, the one who experienced the miracle of your birth, the one who provided you with growing necessities such as food and shelter. A "Mom", on the other hand, is a whole different ballgame.
Moms care for their kids not because they have to, but because they follow their motherly intuitions. Not just merely follow them, but really live them out. A Mom doesn't just put a Band-AidÓ on a cut and walk away. A Mom walks or carries you to the sink, carefully cleans out the cut while comforting you emotionally, puts NeosporinÓ on it, and gently places your favorite Elmo Band-AidÓ over the wound. Or, as my Mom just did as I am writing this, a Mom brings you a tuna sandwich made to your liking on a plate next to your favorite chips. Now that's a Mom.
I have a problem with many Moms of the world today. They are not Moms, they are mothers. They conceive, often by accident, and then are "stuck" with their child. They do not love their children as these kids so desperately need, but watch aimlessly as they grow up to be the serial murderers and other criminals our world is infested with today.
My Mom is the greatest Mom on the face of this planet. And if there are Moms throughout the universe somewhere, she's better than them, too. I'm not one to brag often, but she has raised three beautiful children. Neither me or either of my brothers have ever taken drugs, or abused alcohol. I am proud to say that I am a 16 year old girl whom is NOT pregnant (shocker), and that my brothers have never "inseminated" another girl. None of us have dropped out of school. In fact, we each made honor roll regularly. My two brothers are both enrolled in wonderful colleges, and I plan to be soon. Nick is on his way to med school. Justin will work at Pixar one day. I will become one of the most incredible horse-handlers the world has ever seen. And it's all because of our wonderful mother, who has never, ever given up, and I can tell never plans to.
My earliest recollection is hard to say. I have a poor memory. I do remember whenever I failed a test when I was younger, my Mom was on my case like you would not believe. "What's the big deal?" I used to think. Now look where I'm at. I'm in two AP classes, and I'm not doing half bad. I know people who can't even think about being in an AP class. And I'm in two. If my mother hadn't been on my case about my grades at an early age, I would be sleeping in General classes now, that's for sure, with no hope of ever reaching my goals.
I'm not sure that I could pass the torch and be a good Mom. When I read Rosy's blog, she sounded so confident that she would have a good family. I don't think I can be a good Mom. I'm afraid that I might be too impatient with my kid, and no kid should have to deal with that. But I want kids of my own. I want to share with them what I learned. I get so scared, though, when I think about it. What if I have a daughter who is nothing like me, who wears short skirts and make-up and is pregnant before college, or, worst of all, DOESN'T LIKE HORSES?! Or even worse than that, ENJOYS WALDEN?!?!?! Thankfully, I don't have to worry about that for a long, long time.
That gets me thinking about my own Mom. To her: I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I didn't turn out beautiful. I'm sorry that I refuse to wear make-up, or fashionable clothes. I'm sorry that I stink at any and all sports (except my beloved horse-back riding). I'm sorry that I despise society's "average girl", and wish to never be like her. Sorry that I hate nail polish, and slumber parties. Sorry that I'm not boy-crazy, or have gone through about ten boys yet like most girls. Sorry that I don't want to go to prom, or any dance remotely like it, but instead just want to go to the farm and ride. Sorry that I fight with Nick all the time, don't do enough chores, and apparently am mean in Ms. Bunje's class. But most of all, I'm sorry that I am "wasting" my intelligence. I know that I can be a doctor, or an astronaut (yeah OK), or a writer, but all I want to do is own a farm, and I'm sorry if that depresses you. But I want you to know, that I value this life you've given me, and once I "leave the nest", I promise I can take it from there. Thank you for everything you've ever taught me, but promise me that you'll take care of yourself when I leave, OK?
I Love Ya, Mom.
I have a mom. As much as I feel like she's more of a mother sometimes, I honestly can say that I have a mom. A great one. I agree with Danny in the sense that the word 'mother' has almost a strict connotation attatched to it, which is sometimes where I feel as if I have a mother. But then I read blogs like Leslie's and Becca's, and I realize the REAL difference between 'mother' and 'mom'. Like mostly everyone else said, I do believe that mom's are the women daughter's should look up to, trust, and share close bonds with, and that mother's are just simply the people who gave you life. But I agree with Leslie in the sense that mom's SHOULD lay down the law and argue with you every now and then, just to prove that, hey, they're human, too.
I think the reason that my mom and I are so close is because my family as a whole is very close to begin with. My mom is almost like the best friend that you can't stand sometimes. I know that she'd do anything for me and she loves me with her whole heart and more, but we are so similar that it gets the best of us sometimes. Joanna said she and her mom have the same fights everytime, which are the fights that my mom and I have as well. We fight about something, act too stubborn to look at the opposing side, decide that WE'RE right and the other is wrong no matter what, and both struggle to have the last word. Every. Single. Time. It gets old and all, but mother/daughter fights are a neccessity, I think. Like it was said before, a perfect relationship with someone isn't about never fighting and always getting along. To know that people are human, you have to disagree with them somehow.
It's hard to remember my earliest recollection of my mom. I believe it was when I was four, though, and we were in Disney World for a vacation. My aunt came along with me and my mom and dad, and I remember waking up from a mid-day nap in the hotel room and my aunt being the only person in there. I started crying and crying because I missed my mom so much. I don't know why, though. I was perfectly fine. When my mom came back from the pool with my dad, though, she just held me for awhile and I remember playing with her necklace while I sat on her lap in this great big hug. I'm not sure why this memory sticks out, though.
I honestly would love to be a mom. Not any time soon, of course. I've got a lot of life ahead of me before I start waking up to the same person every day for the rest of it. I would love to have a big, tightknit family when I get older. Hopefully, though, I have four boys instead of one single girl. But even so, I hope we're not exactly alike in the ways that my mother and I are. I've had enough fights with my mom now to want to fight with my children when I'm a mom.
I guess if I could tell my mom one thing that she doesn't know already, it would be that I wish she wasn't so stubborn sometimes. I wish she could open her eyes and see my side of the argument for once. I wish she would accept my certain flaws and faults just like a mom should, instead of pressuring me sometimes to perfect them. And that as much as I really love her, we are sort of falling apart now and I honestly don't mind all that much. I want space and distance from her right now. I feel terrible for saying this, but lately, I don't want to be all that much like her when I grow up.
Mother: a woman that carries you for nine months, delivers you and does only those two major things in your life. Mom: a woman who does the major things mothers do but are there for you throughout your whole life. In some cases a mom does not have to deliver you they can just be a female figure in your life who posses the traits of a mom; nurturing, caring and understanding.
From time to time I reminisce on how I was younger and it was always my mother and I.I would sleep with her at night, she would hold me tight and I would drift off into one of my usual fantasy dreams. I loved when I would sit on her bed while she was painting her nails hot, fiery red and I would beg her to paint my stubby toenails. She would do them but would always say “make sure Lloyd doesn’t see them,” (he was the closet thing to a father I ever had). I would then walk around the house with socks all day or with my toes curled in.
Do I want to bear children and have the responsibility of a mother? Of course I do. While I’m growing up now I always tend to say “I will never do that to my children”. I want my children to have a better life than I had and not go through some of the pain and suffering I did. Its weird because even though we are saying it our moms have also said it when they where going up and that is why they strive to provide and put us in the right direction. Though I want to be a mom, I still want to spend my life fulfilling my dreams and making sure that I am stable and able to provide for my children. I think parents that have children in bad situations are being selfish. My mom is a great mom she does everything for me and is the only person that has been in my life since birth, but at times I wish our relationship was a little more different. My mom is my mom and not a friend or a sister. She doesn’t believe in the whole your mom is your best friend saying. So that’s one thing I want to change when I become a mom. I want my children to be able to know they can come to me about anything and I wont yell or judge them.
There are so many things I want to tell my mother that I don’t think this whole Blogger website would be able to hold it. Bunje I am truly grateful for my mom and everything she does for me and though we may not have the best mother and daughter relationship, I still love her with all my heart. Throughout my 16 years of living she is the only person that has stayed in my life and I am sure she will until the lord calls her on. I love my mother with all my heart and me saying I love 24/7 and 365 days a year doesn’t even amount to how much I really do.
Just like Niah said with her mom being a strong black woman, my mother two posses those same traits, which is something I want and will portray when I to have children of my own.
Since Courtney and I posted about the same time, I didn't get to see hers until after I finished mine. I'd just like to say that I love her blog. And that I hope I'm like Courtney's mom someday, with the Band-Aids, Neosporin, tuna sandwich, and all. And that my kids believe I am the "greatest Mom on the face of this planet. And if there are Moms throughout the universe somewhere, she's better than them, too." I'm sure her mom doesn't mind that she's not the girliest of all the girls, because she seems like such a great mom that wouldn't get wrapped up in judging her own daughter.
And one more thing that would make life easier as as a mom; we ALL hope that our kids despise Walden, Court :)
I have no idea what to put for this blog. A mother and a mom are the same thing to me. I cannot think of a definition for the two. I almost find it absurd that I am unable to differentiate between the two. A mother, as defined by answers.com, is a female person who is pregnant with or gives birth to a child. However, a mom, as defined by answers.com, is a mother. A mom is a female person who is pregnant with or gives birth to a child. It’s syllogism. A mom and mother aren’t different.
I don’t really have a first memory of my mother. It’s so hard to pick something out, because she is just always there. She’s my mother. However, when I think of her and try to recall a moment in time that I will always remember, I think of the few moments’ right before I went into surgery the summer before my freshman year. I was half sedated, frightened, in pain and confused. I could see my mother standing there, at my side, as I lay in the hospital bed. The surgeon came out of swinging doors and started to talk to my parents. At this point everything was starting to blur as the anesthesia started to kick in, but I remember the doctor saying to my mother that I could die from this procedure. Then I remember hearing my mother burst out in tears as they began to roll me into the operating room.
Girls should be independent. Gone are the days where they are only fit for baby making. Gone are the days were women cannot obtain jobs like men. Now more than ever, women are able to prosper, with the same opportunities that are given to men. My mother has been my main parental figure since I was a young kid. With the rising divorce rates, mothers have to be more independent. My idea is that mothers are independent, girls should be too.
I do not want to be like my mom. She is one of my idols, but I do want to be like her. I feel like we are already so different. My mom is not my best friend. My mom is my mom. That’s it. Her job is almost done and then she is going to send me out into the world. I’ll do my thing for a bit, and take care of her when she gets old with my sister. Besides the obvious moral values and standards that I developed as a result of my mother’s views, I do think I have any other traits in common with her. My aspirations for knowledge and wanting to understand why something happens, rather than just accepting it as fact, are over the top for her. My interest in following the latest news such as politics or technology are also other traits that make me, me. I don’t know where I got them, but they didn’t come from my mother. Leslie hit it right on with the full package deal. A mother isn’t perfect. She has to carry traits that aren’t “perfect.” She needs to be real and human. For that, I have to give my mother some respect. She definitely does not disappoint with her package. (Get your mind out of the gutter.)
I could make a whole list of things I want to tell my mother:
- I am sorry for not appreciating in the way that you expect.
- I am sorry for thinking our family isn’t as great as you think it is.
- I am sorry I don’t think we eat dinner together as a family.
- I am sorry for all the times I made you cry.
- I am sorry for breaking the small candle holder you adored when you said I couldn’t sleep over my friend’s house in fourth grade.
- I am sorry for disapproving of the man you chose as a new husband.
- I am sorry for not being able to have the grandkids you anticipated me to have.
- I am sorry for being gay.
First of all, I just read Mike's comment and I just want to tell you Mike that sorry isn't the right word to use. Sorry implies that you regret it, but no one should regret anything about his or her personality, preferences, and beliefs.
For the mom thing, the purpose of writing this blog, I have an actually mom. She takes care of me whenever I need it. For this I am one of the luckiest people I know because I know many people that don't have moms. I feel pity for people that don't have a mom because they don't realize what they are missing, even if they think they're happy. My mom is the person who I talk to when I need something, my mom is the person who makes sure I have everything I need in the morning, my mom is the person who takes a huge load off of my shoulders when she does the little things for me that seem to drag on for forever, adn my mom is the person who is always there for me no matter what happens.
I don't have the relationship some people have with their mother. I don't tell her everything I do, I don't talk to her about my life's problems, I don't talk to her about people that frustrate the heck out of me, and I certainly don't talk to her about what other people are doing with their lives. I don't think that this is necessary, though, in a relationship with a mom. I think the major difference between a mother and a mom is that a mother doesn't show her love on a day-to-day basis, while a mom shows it every chance she gets. I say, "I love you," to my mom every time I leave the house, get out of the car, or hang up the phone. My mom says it back too. We both know that we mean it and that if either of us needed anything from the other, we'd be there in a heartbeat.
The relationship between a mother and her child, though, would not necessarily have this understood relationship. There wouldn't be that mutual desire to appease each other, to help each other, and to be there for each other.
I'm incredibly happy I have a mom instead of a mother, but I think I'd have the same personality if I didn't have a mom. I think I would be prone to do other things with my life than what I am doing now, but I would still be the Michael Galli everyone knows.
I completely agree with Dumebi's, or Gretchen's, Definition of a mother and a mom. A mother does not do anything besides carry you for nine months and then deliver you. A mom is someone who takes care of you and helps you through the hard times in your life and does not have to be the one that gave birth to you. There is a huge difference between the two.
I have a complicated situation with the whole mom/mother thing. My mother used to be most irresponsible heartless woman in my world. I could always see in her eyes she was unhappy with her situation and tired of living life the way she did. I can tell she is tired of crying and hurting the ones she loves. I think she is scared to change because she does not know how to get her feet back on the ground. Ever since I moved in with her she has been slowly getting better. I think the threat of losing all of us (me my sisters and my brother) made her realize she needs to set her priorities straight. So she is slowly turning from a mother to a mom. Even before her transformation began, I had two moms. One of them is my dad's best friend's wife, Lois. She has known me since I was a baby and has always been there for me from every heartbreak right onto the next crush. I have cried on her shoulder when my mother hurt me. I love her so much and I know without her things would have been SO much harder for me. She knows she is my mom. I tell her all the time. My other mom is Leslie's mom. I must agree with her when she says she has the perfect mom. I have only known her for five years but she treats me like a daughter. When things got really bad with my mother she was going to take me in. I owe her so much.
My earliest memory of my mother is when I was in kindergarten. It was right after her and my daddy got divorced. I came home and no one was there. I remember feeling so low because I thought my mom and my dad both left me. I thought no one wanted me. I remember sitting at the back door crying for what felt like hours, but was probably only about fifteen minutes. She finally came home. She was at her friend’s house. She yelled at me for crying and told me stop acting like a baby without asking me why I was crying or what was wrong. When I tried to give her an explanation she wouldn't even let me talk. I don't remember crying in front of her every again. I also don't remember much of my childhood other than things I did with pop pop. I remember bits and pieces but I think I try to forget as much as I can.
When I get older I want to be a mom. I want to be completely involved. I want to be protective without overdoing it. I want to be the kind of mom who bakes cookies and takes their son or daughter to soccer or football or ballet or whatever it is they want to do. I want to be as good as a mom as humanly possible. I always say i do not want to be like my mother, but lately I've been realizing she does a lot of things for reasons. She stays with the assholes she is with because she wants us to have the luxury of having a place to live that isn't one bed room or be able to have a car, or a cell phone. Even though she doesn't always show it I know she loves me unconditionally. I want to be like my mom in the sense that I want to love my children unconditionally, but i do not want to go about doing the way she does.
If I could tell my mother something she doesn't already know it would be that i do not care where we live or how just as long as she is happy and living with all of the luxuries is not worth the pain it brings us. I would tell her I know she does not mean to treat us the way she does all the time and that if it were up to her our lives would be completely different. I would tell her i love her just as unconditionally as i know she loves me.
=)
Wow, it’s really funny that we have a blog on moms this week. It seems like lately she’s been the lodestone to feelings that I’ve never felt (for any person) in my life.
A mother is the person who gave life to you. She doesn’t have to have any kind maternal spirit. A mom is the maternal figure in someone’s life, the person who loves you no mater what. The word mom is supposed to make you feel cozy, warm, and most importantly loved inside. For a while now, and ever since I’ve worked at Five Below I’ve said how much I didn’t want kids. The worst sound EVER is a baby……or a kid screaming! When my sister screams RAGE races throughout my body. I really don’t like crying and screaming kids. Will I have kids when I get older? I don’t know. I might. Sooner or later I might start liking them.
My earliest recollection of my mom was probably when I was about 7 or 8 years old around May-ish. The reason why I can remember is because that’s when I came to the United States. Well, I came to the United States accompanied by a flight attendant. I didn’t know what I would expecting so when I saw a skinny black man (who wasn’t my father) standing with my mother I was a little scared. But none the less I missed my mother very dearly and I ran to her with open arms. At this point in my life I felt like I hadn’t seen her in what felt like 2 years but was actually like 1 1/2. So when we got in the car she buckled me up and began to talk to me. I was so excited to be in a new world. It was so different. She turned to my step dad and said something in what seemed to me at the time to be Chinese and French conglomerated together. I remember I kept asking her “what are you saying? Tell me what you’re saying. I can’t understand you!” My mom was so eager to help me learn.
My mom is the hardest working woman I know. She works 16 hours a day, not including the hours she spends at home trying to be a mom. Not that there’s much time for that, but I know she tries. My mom makes me know that she loves me, and I love her for it. Do I want to be just like her? NO, I don’t. Certain qualities like being hard working and showing others that I care are qualities that she has passed down to me and that I would pass down to my kids, but no. My mom and I are two polar opposite people. I find myself compromising more than I really want to just to keep the peace. Especially now a days.
If I could tell my mom something right now and not be circumlocutions like I’ve been in the passed with her I would tell her how I’ve never been so disappointed at anything or anyone in my life as I am with her. I feel like she’s let me down in the biggest way, and that’s in just giving up. She let herself go. I’ve seen my mom cry more often than I really want to, but I can only be there to consul her and just be there. I hate when she cries. Instead of crying she could be out there doing something about the problem. I know she’s stronger than that. I’ve seem her be strong in harder situations. I feel like I’ve looked up to her so many times in the past despite all her mistakes. It’s helped me succeed and make decisions in my life that I know she would be proud of. I cant do that anymore. I want to tell my mom so bad to just do it. Get it over with. Put our family back on top of that hill that we were once at. I’m trying to help, but my efforts futile. If I could tell her to work harder I would, but I cant because I know she’s already working as hard as her body lets her. The result of her “failure” seems to be wearing harder on me than it is on anybody else in my family. I can’t look up to her like I used to do because if I do I might just end up in the same place. I just wish things were like they were…
First off, I don’t think I can say anything better than Courtney T. did, but I’ll try.
There most certainly is a difference between a mother and a mom. As most people have determined in the other blogs, mothers possess a certain austerity that it not very comforting. They simply carry out their job, and only barely. They may see that you have a roof over your head, clothes to wear, and food to eat, but that’s it. And sometimes they don’t even provide that. That is a mother for you. Even the word sounds harsh when spoken. It is a very structured word that requires one to fully pronounce it, saying every syllable clearly. A mom, on the other hand, brings the feeling of true emotion. The word rolls of the tongue, giving off a rounded sound. It is easily whined, in that forlorn sort of way, which often conjures pity from moms when we are younger. A mother wouldn’t have this pity. Mom’s go above and beyond what is expected. They drive you places when you can’t. They buy you clothes when you don’t have the money. But most importantly, they teach you life lessons that you will carry throughout your entire life. Moms are the reason we laugh, cry, smile, and feel. They’ve instilled in us a sense of moral direction that we often find ourselves thinking about when we’re about to do something bad (maybe its just guilt). I am extremely thankful that I have a mom because I know I would not be where I am today if merely had a mother.
I’ve actually thought about the question “what is your earliest recollection of your mother” even before this blog. It never seemed like a valid question to me. My mom has always been with me. Even though I don’t remember her actual physical appearance since I born, I know that I’ve felt that she was always with me. If you must know of a specific instance, I was about three of four and was walking to our back door to get in our house. I had just come from a birthday party and I held a balloon in one hand and I held my mom’s hand in the other. I accidentally let go of my balloon and watched it float up into space, which instantly summoned tears. I never liked the feeling of loss and could not bear the fact that my precious baby blue balloon was not with me anymore. My mom took me inside and comforted me by drying my tears and assuring me that I would get another balloon some other time. The next time I got one, I remember that she tied the string on my wrist for me so that it would not float away.
I like the idea of having a nice family with kids when I get older, but sometimes I don’t think I could do it. I get way to impatient and always find myself saying thing that I don’t truly mean. I would not want to hurt my kids by my words, because that is the worst.
In a lot of ways, I am already like my mom. Sometimes I hate it, other times I feel blessed. Like Johanna, I didn’t get along with my mom until the beginning of sophomore year because we were both stubborn. If I could have any of her traits, I would want to be open-minded and accepting. I would like to tell my mom that I’ll always love her, even though sometimes she says things irrational. No matter what kind of argument we get in, I always come running back to her because she’s the only one that can make me feel better.
Wow. So I think I just read about 75% of the blogs on here and it took me quite a while. I actually semi-experienced what it is like to be you, Ms.Bunje. Usually I only read around three or four blogs just to get an idea to comment about. But this time, I read a lot and it is really interesting how completely different each and every one of our thoughts about moms/mothers is.
Anyway, a mom. As stated by every single person in this blog, a mother is necessity-realted only. She conceived you and carried you for nine months and then gave birth to you. Or maybe a mother is an adoptive mother, because that happens too. She is your flesh and blood and nowadays that might not count for too much because giving someone a roof over their head and food and the occasional Band-aidO is not enough. It is sort of like that stupid thing in math no one could get right in third grade: A square is a rectangle, but not every rectangle is a square. Well, moms are mothers but not all mothers are moms (Hannah's comment about a house and a home is absolutely right and i think it is a perfect example.) Back to moms, then. A mom cannot be defined by the dictionary. It is like defining the word love, or, Bunje, beauty. It is unique to every person. I believe that a mom is a person who is your role model, your rock, your advice-giver, your lunch packer, your emotional needs therapist, your shoulder to cry on, your homework helper, your womanly-needs specialist, and one of your best friends. This may not be true of all moms, but it is my definition because this is my mom. I love her so much because when she gets home, this is what happens. I tell her everything from my stupid morning bus to my newest reader response logs, to how my junior class meeting was, to the latest drama or gossip going around that is undoubtedly happening. She is the typical mom. Yes, she attempts to help me with my homework, except maybe not AP Stats. She works and pays the bills and does the dishes, without a dishwasher, I might add. She cooks and cleans and yes, she even still drives me to ballet class even though when I'm with her, I could drive myself. She is one of the best people I know because of everything I just mentioned as well as being able to deal with my dad. That is probably the most daunting of all the above things. But that is another story, for possibly another blog.
Okay, so now that I have ranted about how amazing I think my mom is, now for me. As said by all the other girls, NO I do not want to be pregnant anytime soon. We all have some growing up to do still, whether or not the 8% of Oakcrest that is pregnant realizes it. I have been told pretty much since freshman year and on that I am meant to be a mom. I am not even kidding that people refularly tell me, "Christine, you're like my mom. If we were stuck in Oakcrest for a week because of a snowstorm, your purse would get us through it because it has everything." And I admit that that is probably true. My purse is bigger than most people's bookbags because I carry anything and everything in it from highlighters to money to lotion to nail files to band-aids to a tide-to-go. Haha, yes it's true. I am organized. I loooove kids. Babies are annoying sometimes, but that will never change. I babysit all the time and I love it because I have a knack for kids and the like me back. I want to be a mom and apparently, I hope, will be a great one, just like mine. The classic ballet, soccer, football, cookie-baking, school-voluntereing, listening, adive-giver mom.
I don't have a specific first memory with my mom, at least not one that has come to mind over the past 20 minutes I've been typing this. I think that the earliest I can remember is when I was around 4. We were living in Absecon then because I moved to Mullica when I was five for Kindergarten. The attic in our house was in my mom's room with the bright green carpet(don't ask me how that specific memory has stuck.) But one day around this time of year, my mom went up the attic stairs to get down the Christmas decorations. Since this house was a little older, the pull down ceiling stairs did not have a railing. She told me specifically not to follow her...that she would be right back down. But no, I was quite the rebellious little four-year old. I followed her up and fell right off and sprained my wrist, the only time I've sprained/broke a body part. I went to the hospital and I vaguely remember me getting a snoopy sling for my arm. But, I do remember my mom being super sweet and nice and making sure that I was okay. It's not a very vivid memory, but its the farthest back I can go.
Wow, this is long. But lastly, I'm not really sure what I would tell my mom that she doesn't already know. Everything I think about her she already knows because we talk so much. I guess it would be that I really do appreciate her. She drives me to work and dance and back and to school for extra plays and dances and everything. She drives a half hour up and back to Mays Landing at least once a weekend just so I can hang out with my friends and have a good time. Yes, I thank her and tell her I love her, but I'm not sure she really appreciates it. I really do because she does so, so, so much for me. I hope I can be that great. I love her =)
Just in case I forgot to mention someone else's, I want to say that I agree with Hannah that a mom and a mother is like a home and a house. Also, I agree with Leslie that mothers can be strict sometimes, but you appreciate them and love them for who they are and the work that they do for you and your family. And Courtney, just like Emrow said, children will most likely dislike Walden, so I don't think you have anything to worry about =)
I think there’s a difference between mothers and moms. I also have a mother, Ms. Bunje. In the wise words of my older sister, “A mother is a pain in the ass. A mom is what we don’t have.” My mother is judgmental and emotionally unavailable. Unless you want criticism, she’s always available for that. A mom is someone who cares about you and takes care of you. A big part of being a mom who WANTS to take care of you though and not expect anything in return (not saying that you shouldn’t do something) and not complaining about doing it every five seconds.
The first memory I have of my mother...I can’t remember anything specific from my childhood. I only know of things I see in home videos. It is kind of sad. I wish I could. Maybe then I wouldn’t dislike her so much. Maybe she was better with me when I was young.
I definitively want to be a mom. A mom, not a mother. I think the love for a child, your own child, is the only type of love that never falters. I can’t wait to experience that. It’s not even necessary to have a husband when I have one either. I’m not sure how I feel about marriage. I’m not saying it out of the question though. I’m just sure. I want to travel places first single and alone though, without children. Then when they’re old enough I’ll bring them with me.
I DO NOT want to be like my mom. She is rude, irrational, dramatic, stuck up, and has just about every personality trait I’d never want. I do want to cook for my family and work and support them; which she does. However, I do not really think of those things when I think of her. I would much rather make my own food and have her be a little less. Well, horrible.
Joanna. That happens a lot. Mothers and daughters not getting along for years and then suddenly making it work with each other. That’s awesome that you and your mom are friends now. I only met her a few times and she really is wonderful. (Just Like You!) I have a feeling I won’t have even a decent relationship with my mother until I am moved out of the house, out of college, and completely on my own. Hopefully by then it’s not too late.
hmmm mom and mother...My mom always says she walked in the "Valley Of Death" while she was having my siblings and I. I always thoguht it was just a way to make us feel guilty. But in all i understand what she is saying. She was taking care of us no matter what the condition was. She loves us and always expects us to do whats right. She expects not to take all the hard work she has done to us in vein. Right now i don't look for mom or mother characteristics in a girl at all because we are still young, they have the time to learn what is appropriate and what is inappropriate. The whole child thing does not even cross my mind at, i'm young, i don't want to be an adult and have full responsibility to for a child and a baby's momma. In all i don't see a difference in the words mom or mother. I just have always assumed they meant the same thing but mom is the shortened word for mother. Mother momma mom ma, i think they all mean the same thing. My mom knows everyting about my life. She's a lawyer, she knows whats a lie whats a rumor or whats the truth, just by saying a few words. My mom even knew my girlfriend from way back in freshmen year was going to break up with. So i there is nothing i would like to tell my mom. She is important enough to me that she knows everything. I love mom, she makes the best Rice Krispie treats.Although i don't say mother at all, i just say mom, they both mean the same thing...it's just that i like the shorter version of mother better
I've never really thought about this at all but really mom and mother to me means the same thing
Apple Blossom Peralejo which is my mom's name
mom equals mother equalsperson who walked in the valley of death for me
This is a lot of questions and it is 11:00 and I am tired but I don’t want to worry about this tomorrow. I am so glad that Ms. Bunje postponed the paper to Monday now. I’ll start off being technical. There is absolutely no difference between having a mother and a mom. They are the same exact thing if you are going by denotation. The connotations associated with each word are a different answer though. I’ll just quote Rosy because she pretty much sums up what most of us think and she was the first person’s blog I read. “A mother is someone who gave birth to you and that a mom is someone that is with you throughout your life, good or bad.” And also Hannah and Rosy hit it on the head when they said that any woman who is motherly with you and cares for you is your mom. So you can only have one mother but many moms. That’s a creepy thought if you think about it. Personally though, a mother and a mom are the same to me. There are just two different types of mothers or moms, good or bad. A mother isn’t bad and a mom good. And if someone other than your biological mother is very motherly toward you, they are also a mom, but could also be called a mother; mom is just more informal.
I honestly don’t remember my parents in my younger age. I mostly remember my sister and our neighbors because they were my only friends at that age (and of course other family). I just read some of Megan’s blog and it reminded me of the Halloween clown costume I wore when I was four and I do remember that my mom loved it. We were all clowns that year and I’ve heard stories so whether or not the memories are real or just what I created from stories, that’s the earliest thing I remember. And also, Easter egg hunts were big when I was a kid. My mom was part of the Ladies Auxiliary at the Weymouth Firehouse and we were firemen kids so we were always at the firehouse and helped set everything up and she would help me and cheat because she knew where all the good eggs were hidden. I felt like I was the best thing in the whole world at the firehouse because of her.
Most definitely, there are motherly qualities that I think every woman needs in order to be a good mother. That’s compassion, love, humility, and putting their kid first. There are others, but the attitude to take care of your child at all other expense is perhaps the greatest thing mothers need. So many mothers and moms (which are the same remember) have somehow either forgotten this or are selfish, whether they view it that way or not. Many problems kids have are through their parents and many of them could have been avoided if the mom (and even dad, I know but we’re speaking about moms) would spend more time with the kid.
Okay, do I want to be like my mom? In some areas like her love for us I want to be, but I’m already a good mixture between my mom and dad. I honestly don’t want to be like either of my parents because I am a totally different person and Mike Galli is right, you shouldn’t be ashamed of your personality and preferences. I feel like sometimes we are inclined to be like our parents but we really shouldn’t be. I want to end this since it’s 11:20 now and I have to wake up soon and I write too much sometimes.
So tell my mom something I never told her before? There really isn’t anything except stuff I haven’t told her in the past few days because this week is really hectic. I mean, I’ve apologized for everything so much but I do so much for her and she does so much for me. We have a great relationship. I don’t know what else I would want to tell her. Maybe just that I want to know more about her life and how my parents met, but that’s kind of different. Well that’s it, 17 more days of school til Christmas break.
Like there being a difference between a sperm donor and a father, there is definitely a difference between a mother and mom. I myself have a mother a woman who forgot her responsibilities right after she stopped pushing. Many will tell you since I was born my mother was lost when I came to raising a child, she had never been a mother before so who could blame her right? Well I can blame her, regardless of whether or not a woman has been a mother before, all women should have this biological motherly instinct that says “hey your kid has her hand in the light socket, maybe you should tell her no.” My mother can be a wonderful woman; she has a heart of gold and will open to anybody, ultimately meaning her friends and boyfriends. Oh the beloved boyfriends, lets just say my mother is horrible at picking “Mr. Right.” Starting from the beginning my mother has had many terrible boyfriends. As her boyfriends would come and go I was always the one person she had to lean, I was and still am her rock. Every time she got hit, every time she cried, every time I was the one that had to listen and if she wasn’t venting she was blaming it one me. It was my fault the relationship went wrong. I don’t have a mom, I have a mother. I have a woman that is there to tell me what to do when she wants to act like a mom. It took me until this year to accept my mother and the way she is, because as much as I would love to have a mom, she will never be one. Boyfriends, friends they all come before me and that will never change. She will never recognize that I have been the only person to ever stay to ever pick up her pieces after she has fallen. Not her boyfriends, not her friends, her daughter. All of the things my mother has put me through and continues to put me through have just been a lesson for the future. When I become a mother when I decide to create a human being I will go into labor knowing that I am going to be a mom. I will be a role model, a friend, I will be a mom! One day my mother will find herself, and that’ll be the day she will want to be my mom, but by then it will be to late. It’ll be to late because right now it’s already to late. I love my mother and that’s why I continue to pick up her pieces and deal with all the heartache she puts me through, but I accept that I will never get that in return. My mother has always put the blame on my, everything is my fault, but that’s fine because in the end I will be the bigger, more mature woman. I am my own mother. There in no doubt in my mind that my mother doesn’t love me, but my mother doesn’t appreciate me. Me, I will love and appreciate my kids even after I die, I will never be my mother. If there is one thing I could tell my mother that I never told her before would be, I appreciate you mom, I have given my all something you have never done, but I will never stop loving you because I know you need me, but I don’t need you, I never have. I accept who you are, I accept you.
I agree with Du’s definition of a mother she took the words right out of my mouth. A mother really is only someone who carries you for nine months then delivers. I never want to be considered as a mother I want to always be considered as a mom when it comes time for me to have my children. If that is how your child preserves you, as a mother rather than a mom, there is definitely something wrong.
My mom is a neverending song in my heart of comfort, happiness, and being. I may sometimes forget the words but I always remember the tune. ~Graycie Harmon
I remember my mother's prayers and they have always followed me. They have clung to me all my life. ~Abraham Lincoln
Both of these quotes reflect the love, respect and appreciation that Graycie Harmon and Abe Lincoln feel towards their maternal figures. The only difference, is the Graycie uses the term "mom" and Lincoln uses "mother". But there is no difference. Just as Gary said, the denotation is exactly the same, but the connotation seems to be different. But connotation is a personal thing, and is probably different for every single one of us. For me, Mother does not bring any negative feelings. In fact, it is the complete opposite. I have a couple moms, but I only have one mother. And I don't mean just one woman who gave birth to me, even though there is only one, but rather only one that I know will love me no matter what. I could become the worst person in the world, and she would still love me. I can tell her absolutely ANYTHING, and I would never have to worry about losing my relationship with her. I am lucky enough to have a mother such as this. It is the opposite of Ariel's definition. My moms, are different. I don't even call my mother "mom", I call her "Mama". My moms are maternal figures, but the bond is not half as strong. I call my boyfriend's mother "mom" since we have been dating so long and I love his mother and I like to spend time with her, but she isn't one of my BFFs. But if my relationship were to end with my boyfriend, I would probably lose that relationship with my "mom".
My earliest recollection of my mom. Hmm. That's a hard one. I would probably have to be her singing to me. My mom has a phenomenal voice. It could put an insomniac to sleep if she needed to. She always used to sing "You are my Sunshine" to me. Either that, or "Emily, Do you love me?", her own version of the one from Fiddler on the Roof.
Do I want to be a mother? ABSOLUTELY! That is the one thing I am looking forward to in the future. I could do the worst job in the world, but as long as I am a mother, I will be happy. I've been told many times that I am too young to know that already, but ever since I was little, I always wanted to be a mom, and when my little brother was born, when I was nine, I knew for sure that I wanted kids. But I don't think I am too young. I think it is better that I know now because then I can choose a career that will be able to work around my family, instead of having to give one up later.
Do I want to be like my mother? I am my mother already! I am like her mini clone. First of all with the looks. I have been told so many times that I look just like my her, but if you saw a picture of her when she was 17, we look identical. But even personality, we are almost exactly the same. It is kind of scary sometimes, but I am proud to be like her. She is one of the most amazing people I know. I just hope that one day, my kids will feel the same way about me.
What would I tell my mom? I would probably tell her that sometimes I feel neglected and ignored in my family. I am held to higher standards because I am smart, and I have so much potential, but I never get rewarded by my parents. Just once, I would like to get that giant bear hug with the watery eyes and hear "I am so proud of you!", from either of my parents.
There is a huge difference between being a mother and being a mom. Being a Mom, necessitates a feeling of closeness. A Mom is someone who loves their child unconditionally and is willing to do anything to help them to succeed. The biggest difference in my opinion is that Moms are characterized by internal qualities while Mothers are characterized by external qualities. Moms need to have love, patience, caring, and whole bunch of other virtues when dealing with her children. All someone needs to be a mother is a working vagina and a man to impregnate them. Anyone who comes to term with a pregnancy and gives birth to a child is technically a mother regardless of what happens after that moment. Everything after that child’s birth is what determines whether that woman will move from the purely literal definition of mother to the much more deep connotations which are found in the phrase Mom.
Like Gary, I really don’t remember what my earliest memory of my mother is. I’ve been racking my mind for what that would be but frankly once I get to a certain point in my youth all of my memories seem to get muddled together. I would guess its because I had no real point of reference to remember when things were. Nowadays we can determine when certain events took place by thinking of what year of school it took place in. Trying to think of early memories, I remember standing on my porch the day I turned 5, but my Mom wasn’t there so I guess that doesn’t work. I also have a vague memory of years before that when I would sit on the couch as my mom would shush my brother out the door so that they would get to school in time. I guess going back a bit further I do remember a bit of when my mom would babysit Nick Cincotti, and Frank Ogden. I think that’s as far back as I can go right now. Everything beyond that I could never even hope to get a definitive idea of specifically when it happened.
There are a lot of qualities in Mom’s that us men tend to like in women. We naturally want kind-hearted women who are kick-ass at cooking and who will clean up and take care of us. I don’t mean to be sexist, but to a certain extent men are attracted to that sort of homemaking skills. People often claim that all men are interested in is sex. This simply is not true. Food is just as important to most men if not more important. Nothing attracts a man better than a big plate of cookies or a tray of brownies. All men naturally want to find for themselves a woman who can care for them and their potential future children just as well as their mother did (Or better than their mother did if they had a bad mother.)
I really wouldn’t mind being like my mom in some ways. She is a woman of God, which I really respect about her. She is a good Mom and she really cares about her family. I don’t know if there’s really anything extremely hard hitting that I’ve really keep silent from my Mom. It seems like there’s really nothing I feel like I really have to get off my chest honestly. I mean we do argue sometimes but we really do have a decent relationship.
I believe that there is a difference between a mom and a mother. I agree with Hannah, in that, a mother gives you life, and that a mom is always there for you. Unconditionally, a mom has to be there for her child, but if she isn't, that classifies her as a something else. I'm not too sure of what to call her, but it's not quite a mom. I think that there is a lot of gray area when it comes to talking about parental figures since everyone's interpretation of their parents are different. Regardless, a mom is one person you don't want to lose, because everything that they do has a purpose, even if you aren't sure what they are trying to convey. You'll eventually realize it and either be happy that you listened, or mad that you didn't.
If i can remember, the earliest recollection i have of my mom is her going to work. When I was younger i barley saw my mom in the mornings. Since she left for work around 6 or 6:30am, I never really saw her in the mornings. Except for the rare occasions that i was up before she left. So, in her absence, I saw my dad and my sister a lot. I saw my sister practically everyday and it was fun going over her house. Especially since she had a pool. But I do remember my mom cooking dinner almost every night. I used to think that she liked to cook but I've come to realize that if she could, she would like to live with out it. That goes to show how much i knew when i was younger.
Since I'm in high school, I try not to think of girls becoming moms. It seems a little weird. I guess because I don't want to think of me being a dad. Well not yet. I don't want to have to worry about a baby and other things like that. But, i hope my wife will know how to cook since the extent of my cooking goes about as far as microwaving TV dinner or a hot pocket. It gets the job done, but if i'm still hungry, I'll eat some ice cream or something. I have this thing all planned out. I guess if i could tell my mom one thing, it would be... to listen when i say something. majority of the time she gets my stories mixed up or either doesn't hear me at all. She constantly says "What?" I guess that's why i repeat myself when i talk. Who knows? This was a rather interesting question, I wonder if we'll talk about dads next...hmmm.
I never really thought about what it would be like to not have a mother. I know friends who have great relationships with their moms. On the other hand I know a few people who do not have a good established relationship with their mom, whether it be via divorce or any other circumstances. In attempting to try to understand what it would be like without a true mom, I think there are several steps to follow. First if there a difference between a mom and mother. I don’t think that there is a major difference between a mom and mother. Sometime I call my mom mom and sometime mother, it doesn’t matter. However, I can see where some people seem like mom is just someone who gave birth to you and a mother is someone who cares for you, but I agree with Danny L because I don’t really know the true meaning of the word mom either. To me a mom or mother is someone who cares for you as a child, and is their for you as a parent, friend, therapist, or anything you could think of.
I am really sorry for those who do not experience the feeling of a mother, because it is one that personally I never want to lose. No matter how many times I disagree with her, or fight with her, or ignore, I know that I will always love my mom and that the temporary feeling of anger is out of love, and will be gone soon. It seems as if those who have a mother cannot possibly understand the idea of not having one, and in some cases those without a mother or a bad mother relationship yearn for one. Just the thought of me without a loving mother, or a bad relationship with my mom is bizerk. I remember her for being loving and protective, since I was her first. I cannot recall any particular event, just that I know she constantly worried for my care and sfaety anytime I would do something that gave her a spec of doubt.
To answer the “what do you look for in a wife that will eventually be a mom” question, I say nothing in specific. For me it is hard to first find a girl with all the likeable qualities and then label her with the ones she displays best. There is no criteria for a mom, moms just do what they think is best, whether it be right or wrong. And if there is a girl who is capable of being a wife, then I have little doubt that she will be capable of being a mother.
I believe there is a huge difference between having a mother and having a mom. I have a mom. But I met enough mothers to know the difference. A mother is someone who gave birth to you, and then that was all. She never offered any guidance or direction and didn't exactly make her child feel loved afterward. I completely agree with Leslie about what makes a mom. A mom is the complete package; flaws and all. She teaches from experience and tries to direct you away from having the same flaws as her own. A mom is there for you unconditionally. She is someone that you know will always love you no matter what you do. I myself go to my mom for almost everything. I tell her almost everything and let her know whats going on in my life. She listens and gives me advice and she doesn't label me or judge after I'm done talking. She tells me her opinion and then lets me vent some more. My mom and I arn't always this friendly to each other though. There are times when we will fight and it seems like one of us will truly kill the other, but then after we both calm down, we usually both apologize and we're back to being mom and daughter again, even friends. My mom embarasses me constantly, rarely lets me out past 11, tells me what to do, and gets on my back about school constantly. But thats why I love her. These annoying characteristics of a mom show how much she cares. She is looking out for me and making sure I grow up to be the best that I can be. She's being the best "mom" she can be, flaws and all.
I'm not too sure what my earliest recollection of my mom is, but one memory I will always have of my mom was when I was three and she had cancer. My mom is one of the strongest people I know, and I learned this from the memories of this time period. I remember walking into the bathroom one day and seeing her pulling out a few strands of hair. For some reason though, I don't remember ever actually finding out she was sick, or where she went when she was in the hospital. I was always afraid of her when she took her wig off, but she never showed me that it upset her. She would just tell me she was "taking her hair off now" and then ask if I wanted to leave. I always did. Then one day she told me the same thing and asked again. This time though, I said I wanted to stay. I remember her smile. And how she made sure I wasn't scared as she took off her wig. Her smile seriously went from ear to ear, I swear. I was only three and had made my mom the happiest person on earth in that moment.
I do want to be like my mom. Maybe not exactly her though. She has her flaws, some that I wouldn't want to have, like how she can get angry over the smallest things. I don't want my kids to tip toe around mistakes. I want them to be open with me and I dont want the ability to fly off the handle over little things. I do however want to be like my mom in almost every other way. I want to be able to laugh with the kids, teach them everything I can, and most of all, like my mom, I want them to love me as much as my brothers and I love my mom. She may be crazy, like we've heard hundreds of times, but it's in her craziness that we see the real her. The person she was before she had us. The woman who loved the ocean and loved to laugh, but not a normal laugh, a huge belt it out laugh. (Jo can definately explain my moms laugh to any of you, its pretty intense.) The girl who grew up by the beach and let the ocean breeze lead her where ever she felt like going. She is the most spontaneous person in the world I think, which is probably why we've had our share of random adventures and a horse. I want that. I want to just wake my kids up one day and say, "Pack your bags, we're going to Florida for a little." I want them to live, to enjoy life, the way that my mom taught us to live.
If there was one thing I could tell my mom it would probably be I'm sorry. I don't exactly always treat you like I should, and sometimes I guess I forget that you're just like me and probably just as sensitive. I don't mean to get so mad and annoyed, maybe it's just the whole teenage daughter, mom thing, but still I'm sorry.In the moments when we get along so perfectly, and I'm able to tell you everything, when you aren't flipping over something, and I'm not mad that you did earlier, I swear I see a you as a best friend. I wish we got along that well always. But you will always be my mom, I could never see you as a mother.
When I think about moms, that Tupac song Dear Momma plays in the back of my head that has that simple line, “You are appreciated”. Mothers should be appreciated for bringing you into the world, but it is just not that simple. It is a lot more work being a mom than it is to be a mother. Of course, going through child labor is tough but being there for your child every minute of their life shows a lot more dedication. I think every mother should be a mom. If you take on the responsibility of bringing a baby into the world, then it is your job to care and love that baby, as it should be the new center of your world. A mother is simply a woman parent, someone who brings a baby into the world. For a mother to be a mom, she has to be there through the tears, the accomplishments, the wrong decisions, lead their child to right decisions, answer questions, have fun memories, have a picture of their kid in their wallet and be proud to show everyone they may run into while grocery shopping or in line at the bank. For a kid to call their mother “mom” shows a comfortable bond between child and parent. For a child to call their mom “mother” shows they may not be so comfortable, and maybe scared of them. I am not sure of my earliest recollection of my mom, however I am sure my childhood was full of love and care from her. I cannot think of a time I felt abandoned by her and unloved. The relationship I have with my mom is great and it makes me want to be the same kind of mom for my kids. There is nothing that I could say in this blog that I want my mom to know that I haven’t already told her because our relationship is very open. I can tell her things that others can’t tell their moms. Monica said her mom is rude, irrational, dramatic, stuck up, and has just about every personality trait I’d never want. My mom is different in my eyes and she is definitely someone I would want to be just like. I love my mom and sometimes I take for granted how lucky I am to have a mom like my mom is because alot of people don't and that is really sad.
I do believe that there is a very significant difference between a mother and a mom. A mother is simply a woman that gives birth. A mom on the other had is a mother which is there for their child. She cares for her child both physically, mentally and emotionally and most importantly shows her child her unconditional love. In all honestly, I don’t really remember much about my childhood. The earliest thing I can really remember is when I was like five and even that is blurred by the hand of time. So I’ll have to say that my earliest recollection of my mother is when I was like five and she took me out trick or treating in my great-grandmother’s neighborhood (the same great-grandmother that I am now blessed to live with). I was the blue power-ranger for those of you interested.
I can’t really say that I want to be like my mother because I already am just like her. We are both pretty honest people and both tell it like it is, I’m just a bit more honest than her. We are both very fun loving and try to make the most out of life. We are both forever skeptical with just about everything and our minds are always in the gutter. On top of that we both are quite opinionated, we always have something to say but normally just don’t say it. One thing that my mom has and I didn’t manage to inherit and would have liked to is the ability to spell and the ability to read while there are a hundred other things going on. Well honestly, if there is something that I chose not to tell my own mother, what makes you think that I’m going to tell you? With that being said there is nothing that I would tell my mom that she didn’t already know, because she knows pretty much everything. I have nothing to hide and no secrets to keep from her.
Similar to Darrell I believe if there is a girl out there who is capable of being my wife, than they will make an excellent wife. Because we all know I’m a hand full and not everybody can deal with me. There is just too much to me for most people to handle or want to know. So if a girl is capable of being my wife, than they are more than qualified to be an excellent mom.
I never thought about the difference between having a mother and a mom. To be honest I always thought mother was more proper to write than mom. I’d have to disgree with Megan. (don’t put me in the doghouse for this) When it comes to distinguishing the two, I believe women are moms when they give birth. To become a mother women have to love and nurture the baby. For example, mothers are the women who look after their child and are there for them when they are in need and need guidance. Moms are women that give birth to a child. They may live in the same house as the child, but they do not participate in the child’s life and take care of the child as a mother would. I guess I came up with this answer because of what I first thought the difference was between mother and mom. Mother is more proper and as I described above, a mother takes more of the proper actions and nurtures their child. Mom is less proper like I described above. My mother is always there for me and is looking out for me. She has always guided me and has been there when I needed her. At times when she saw I was heading for trouble, she’d be there to put me back on the right track. She is always there and I know she loves me the way I love her.
When it comes to interacting with the female sex, there are certain qualities that in females that that I associate with the idea of mothers. Friends that I have demonstrate these qualities everyday. Some look out for friends and make sure they do what is best for them. Others are great with babies and young children. The way they take care of the baby or children and interact with them, I can tell they would be a great mother.
I would like to be like my mother. I mean I wouldn’t be able to be just like her and I think we know why, but that’s a whole different story. In all seriousness, I would like to have some of the qualities my mother portrays when I become a parent. I’d like to guide my child through his young years and be there for him when he needs help. I’d like to give him the best possible childhood imaginable. I understand when my mother needs to be strict. If she wasn’t strict when she had to be then from an early age I probably would’ve went off on the wrong track. There are times that I remember when I was young where she had to step in and talk to me. Even though I hated her at the time, I understood. As a parent I will be reasonable.
My mother and I have a pretty strong relationship. At times I know she feels sad because we fight but deep down I love her. It’s part of being a teenager I guess. You have your fights here and there. There are times where I can tell the men of the house hurt her feelings badly. When I see this I apologize and let her know I’m sorry. Then there are the times when I know she is pissed but I know I can joke about it because in the end she’ll be laughing too. For example, the time when the potato exploded in the oven and she blamed it on the men of the house. As she cursed up a storm in the kitchen, I video taped her and in the end she was cracking up at it. All in all I love my mother.
I think there is a difference between a mom and a mother, but it’s hard to really set a specific definition. I think a mother is, as everyone pretty much said, the person that births you, but I also think they are the person that is responsible for teaching you the basic things of life, whether or not they do a good job or even care. A mom could be this, but they are the ones that want to raise you and would never want anyone else to do it. They care about you and the things that you do and who you will become. I really like Courtney T’s definition of a mother. Although my mom doesn’t usually bring me a tuna sandwich, and she actually gets upset when I get hurt, she does go that extra distance sometimes and brings me cookies when I have a lot of homework to do and I’m stressed. I have a mom, which is made clearer to me by the fact that I have a father, and not a Dad. Although I don’t think he’d really fit as a father either. This is actually what makes me the most frustrated. My mom has to almost play two roles, and there’s no one to balance her out or take over when she has a bad day. My relationship with my mom has been dramatically affected by the fact that we’re the only ones that live in our house and that I have a brother that is rarely home because of being away at college for four years and then being in the navy for the past 2 years and will be in it for the next 2-3 years.
I have a lot of vague memories about my mom during childhood. I remember sitting on her lap in the rocking chair whenever I felt bad, and feeling so relieved when she came home from work. I also remember the way she did my hair when I was little (I usually hated it) and the horrible matching vest I had to wear on Thanksgiving (my mom still has hers). The earliest distinct memory I have of her is waking up on my fourth birthday and finding her in the kitchen cooking something.
I do want to be a mom, but it seems that the older I get, the less I can deal with kids. I guess I’ve seen a lot of mothers lately from a different perspective, and I can’t help feeling that I never want to grow up to be like them. Sometimes I think that my mom isn’t happy with the life she’s lived, although she would never say that and she doesn’t seem to regret anything in the long run. Still, I feel she’s made a lot of mistakes that I don’t want to make, and the fact that she’s had two failed marriages speaks for itself. I don’t blame her at all for this, but I know I’d never want to have to go through something like that. She had a pretty hard childhood, and I really appreciate how hard she works to make sure everything is okay with me and that I won’t make some of the mistakes she made. I guess I’d say that I’d like some of my mom’s patience, and although she loses it sometimes she’s had to put up with a lot and made it through. I really admire my mom’s insights into people, her advice on dealing with people and organization. The first thing that came to mind to tell my mom was that she has done a really good job teaching me to drive. But I think I’d also want to tell her that I’ve appreciated all of the things she’s done for me despite her going over-board sometimes.
My mom has always, and will continue to always, play the most significant role in my life. When I think about it, I could not imagine living one day in her shoes. How she manages a family of my dad, sister and I, works non-stop five days a week as a principal of the largest elementary school in the state of New Jersey, cleans, cooks, shops...it is truly beyond me. She is a woman of so much strength and it almost seems as if she can make it through any complication that comes her way. She has so much wisdom and pride, and is always there for me in everything that I do. I am so blessed to have a mom that supports every decision that I have ever made, and will continue to do so in the future. Not many children are lucky enough to have not only a mom in their life, but a teacher, and a best friend. I do not believe that their is necessarily a difference between a mother and a mom; however, I do feel that there are certain levels to the role that they play in your life. A mom, to me, is a strong woman that will always be their to support her children and provide them with unconditional love. A mom is someone who always seems to know the right thing to say or the right thing to do. A mom is a figure that should make her children and her husband her number one priority, and expect to get a countless amount of love and respect in return. Lastly, a mom is someone who is always their to give her best advice, but not necessarily make your decision. My mom is my hero, it's as simple as that. She is an amazing woman and without her who knows where in the world i would ever be, seriously. As I sit here writing this, I feel as if i want to say so much but don't even know where to begin or how to say it. My mom is basically the one thing that keeps me going each day. She keeps the smile on my face, even though we disagree at times. She solves so many of my problems whether it is boys, friends, or anything beyond. My mom sets a good example for my sister and I, and leads us in a path so we will be able to do the same for our children. If i could have one wish, any wish in the world, I would ask to be just like my mom when I grow up. There is no other person in this wolrd that i look up to or admire more than my very own mother. Lately it seems as if our relationship has become more close. I guess that's part of growing up. As i grow into a woman, who else better to follow than the one person that has made me everything and anything that I am. I used to be quiet and hide my feelings, never letting her into my life. I would talk to her, but not about anything personal...maybe i was just shy. Now, though, i'm beginning to realize the importance of including my mom in my life. When my friends aren't there for me, when nothing seems to be in it's correct place, I have learned that the one person that will always be on my side is my mom, and I love her so much for that. Sure, as every other mother and daughter, we disagree at times and share our differences. My parents spoil me, and sometimes, probably most of the time, I am way too ungrateful. I just want my mom to know that everything that she does for me, I am so thankful for. No words could ever describe the way I feel about my mom, and if i even attempted to thank her, i would be writing forever. One day, when I grow up to be successful and happier than ever, someone will ask me who i owe it all to. I don't owe it to my friends. I don't owe it to my teachers. And i don't owe it to any celebrity or professional athlete. I owe it all to my mom.
I agree with Devon when she talks about the patience issue. My mom has so much patience with me. I know I can be the worst sometimes, and if I were to be in her shoes, I would definitely want to scream. She is so good at handling every situation, where I get all nervous and worked up when one little thing doesn't go my way. Maybe one day when I have children of my own, I will acquire her virture of patience and find the importance of having it.
I love this blog question because I love my mom. I have been thinking about for the past hour what I should write because I want to make it perfect because I feel my mom deserves perfection. As I wrote the word “perfect” I thought of the song from the Backstreet Boys that my mom has told me she wants to dance to with my brother when he gets married. In their song “Perfect Fan,” the chorus states just some of the special attributes of a mom.
You showed me
When I was young just how to grow
You showed me
Everything that I should know
You showed me
Just how to walk without your hands
cause mom you always were
The perfect fan
I believe that this song just touched on only some of the basics of a mom though. I guess having a mom that has been there for me my whole life, traveling sports events hours away just for a practice, or teaching me how to cook and become a mom just like her, or taking a lay off from work just so she could be with me and my family. My mom is exactly what I feel that all moms should be like I believe she is my perfect fan.
I do believe that there is a difference between a mom and a mother though. I have been privileged to have a mom but my cousin has a mother. My mom’s sister, and my aunt has only been a mother to my cousin. A mother is just the person who brings you into this world and cares enough for you that when you grow old you can take care of yourself. My cousin, Patti, who is now married and has to kids does not even speak to her mother any more. Her whole life her mother always cared more about her older sister Jennifer. A couple months before Patti was going to get married her mother thought that she was going to marry the devil and that the marriage would last no longer than five years. Well, even though I don’t speak with my aunt or cousin Jenny anymore, my mom has always been there for Patti just like the mom she doesn’t have. My mom and me go up to where Patti lives as much as possible and I take care of the two little girls and my mom always makes sure to give Patti enough attention that her mother didn’t give her.
I DEFINITELY want to be a mom. I always take care of Patti’s kids and whenever she has parties over her house with a bunch of little 2 through 4 year olds over I am always the one taking care of all of them. They all seem to love me and that just puts a joy into my heart that I can’t wait for when I get older. I would have to say though that I have been taught by the best, my mom.
I absolutely want to be like my mom when I get older. I want to teach my kids how to play sports or play music, or teach them to cook and drive them everywhere and most of all just show them love. Because after noticing the difference between my mom and aunt is that my mom tells me that she loves me and my aunt never told my cousin she loved her.
There is nothing that I could say on this blog that I haven’t told my mom. We are best friends and I tell her EVERYTHING. We have the greatest bond a girl could possibly have with their mom. Like Emily Rheault said she is close with her mom but mother/daughter fights are a necessity. My mom and me do get into arguments but I know that they happen because even though she is my best friend she also needs to show that sign of authority over me. If I would say anything to her I would say that I love her and am proud that she is my mom and I believe she is my perfect fan.
Where do I start when I talk about the beloved lady I call my mom. This blog is more serious then I first thought it to be I read like six peoples blogs and some of them are real deep but I’ll get to that later my mom is probably one of the most important people in my life. And although were not suppose to have a favorite parent just like parents aren’t suppose to a favorite child I secretly do. Obviously it’s my mommy. She has always been there for me and always was the one who came through for me when I needed her most. I do believe there is a distinct difference between a mother and a mom. A MOTHER is a lady who gave birth to you and could careless about how you felt or what you needed it life. In some cases she doesn’t even have to be the one that gave birth to she can just be the next lady your dad decided to get with. But a mom, it takes a special person to be a mom. A mom is the woman who will wake up at three o’clock in the morning because her child is crying and need her to comfort them. A MOM is the woman who will go above and beyond and sometimes even without to make sure her children have what they need. She is the nurturer, the backbone, and the epitome of what is essential in what a child should have in their life. If anybody knows me they know my mom is insane. Oh course not literally but she is pretty crazy I love her to death though. When I am old enough for someone to call me mom I don’t want to be just like my mom but I want to be like her she has a good balance between a mother and a friend. My mom in a sense is kind of like my best friend in a way that she is always there for me and I can go to her about almost anything the only thing different between her and my actual best friends is the fact that I have a hard time taking any type of criticism from my mom her words can cut like a knife not matter how she intended me to actually take it. If there is one trait I don’t want to inherit from my mom in that She is an avid yeller my mom will yell about anything and everything from the simplest things as there being a piece of paper on the floor. But what can I say nobody is perfect everyone is entitled to having at least one annoying idiosyncrasy. My earliest memory of my mother is something I really had to think about. But I finally thought of one. I remember probably being about three or four and waking up in the morning and running in the room to get in bed with my mom and dad. I had this favorite stuffed animal named snuggles and every morning would climb into bed with snuggles in tow and wake my mom up. She used to wrap me in her arms and takes snuggles and pretend he was talking and in a real soft voice she’d go snuggles. And make this loud sniffing sound with her nose and then have the bear kiss me. Weird I know but I will never forget that. If I could tell my mom anything on this blog I would tell her that if she died I probably would just want to give up and that no matter how annoying I may make her out to be I love her to death and there is no one who can take her place my appreciation for her is unconditional. I want to tell that she is a remarkable single mom and strong and determined and does a damn good jog at providing for her daughter who at times can act like a spoiled bitch but no matter how many times I have huffed and puffed my moms love for me never lessened. I forgot to say that I have a step mom notice how I didn’t say mother. She is one of the nicest people you could ever meet. I love her a lot differently than I love my real mom of course but that doesn’t mean she is not like a mom to me. She never wants to see me fail and I also thank God for her too. In response to Rebecca’s blog I think that has to be one of the saddest things I have ever heard I mean how could your mom be so cruel. And also Leslie was right when she mentioned the thing about the full package nobody could have send it better. If my mom was the happy go lucky mom who just let me do whatever whenever like I may whine that I wish she did I wouldn’t have the same morals and values that I do
I agree with Hannah with everything that she stated about the difference between a mother and mom. A mother goes through the birth process, but a mom is a person that someone can look up too, learn things from, and talk to about anything. A mother usually has qualities of mom, but a mom does not have to be the one that gave birth to you, like Hannah said.
I don’t want to be a mom. I don’t like babies and I have no idea why people ask me to baby sit. I guess I feel like I should go help the parents escape the craziness of their life with their untamed kids for a night. I like kids in small doses. Small kids, I mean. Two hours with kids between the ages of 1-12 is plenty of time for me to spend with them. I like older kids, so if I was a mom I’d be afraid of neglecting my kids until they reached a certain age. Maybe my mind will change when I get older. Who knows?
I believe I was three or four years old when I went to Disney World for the first time. My mom had a stroller that my brother and I never used because we wanted to run to everything. I’m surprised my parents didn’t leash us. Any way, I remember my mom wanting character pictures with every single Disney Character that we could find. We went out of our way to find Mickey, Tigger, and Cinderella. My mom loved taking pictures of the oddest things, but as long as Joe and I were in the picture, she was happy. I remember being really hungry all of the time and my mom would run to the nearest food stand and buy me chicken fingers with BBQ sauce. I was a fat little child, but when my mom came back with food, I’d give her a hug and kiss and I remember my mom saying, “Don’t ever stop giving me those huggies and those kissies.”
My mom and I have been going through this time where we haven’t been close to one another and have been at each others throats, but today we talked about everything and got everything off of our chests. This is a quality that I want from my mom, being able to confront my problems and do it in a way that is calm, cool, and collected. She sometimes looses her head, but who doesn’t. I’m glad, though, we are getting back to being close as we once were.
Things I would love to say to my mom-
-I’m not Joe
-I love you
-I want you to be proud of me no matter how much I mess up.
-I want to be able to see your side of different situations
-I want us to be close again
To wrap this blog up, I’ve missed my mom being the one I talked to about everything and I have missed her talking to me about everything. She is a big part of my life and I don’t know what I would do without her sometimes.
I believe Megan summed it up perfectly when she said “House is to home as mother is to mom.” It was a great comparison. Kudos! There is a difference between mom and mother. A mom is more personal and shows a close and personal relationship with a mom and child. A mother is an egg donor who spent “Twenty-three and a half hours in labor with you”. My mom at the present moment in time is a combination of the two, if that is even possible. I suppose that is why I really don’t call her either mom or mother. I catch myself calling her Ma or, when I feel like being cute, Mama. My mother and I were best friends for the majority of my life. This all changed the beginning of my sophomore year. It was mainly due to my “life choices”, so to speak. I won’t go into detail, because I am sure that none of you really care. I will just say that my mother tries “protect” me from things that I do not necessarily need protection from. I need to live my life, make my own mistakes. I need to learn from my own mistakes, not from hers. The only way I can truly find myself and find my way in the world would be to live my life, not be scared of it. Because she does not understand this, we fight and argue daily. I love my mother, but I need to get out of here.
The earliest memory of my mother was me and her in my kitchen. I was crying and upset because my mom gave my cousin Lauren cookies, and not me. Mind you, I was a wee lil’ baby, so I really couldn’t handle cookies, but I still wanted them. Story of my life. I am still on the fence on whether or not I want to be a mother. One hand, I would love to have children. I want to have lots of little babies, little boys to take up to Vermont to go snowboarding and little girls to teach about life. Not force life down their throats though. I want to be like my mom in every way that does not have to do with her being a mom. I already am so much like her, except I will promise myself that my daughter can date who ever she wants as long as he isn’t a druggie or something.
One thing I would like to tell my mom (this is funny cause she is two feet away from me at this point) is to let me be me. I will be fine. I am not going to fail at life, so don’t worry about me anymore. Let me grow up, stop holding me back.
Yes I definitely think that there is a difference between a mother and a mom. A mom, like so many before me have said, is someone who is there for you no matter what and puts you before everything else. A mother however, gave birth to you and there is not much more. For me I am like Becca to a point. My parents got divorced and since then I am put second to my mother’s fiancé. I wish there was a word in between mom and mother to describe the woman who gave birth to me. I don’t really know what to call her. I think it is more of a mother though. As jo said “I can't really understand why I was so annoyed with her for no reason before. I think all girls go through a period where they just don't like their mom and they argue a lot.” I have reasons to be annoyed at my mom but I hope she finally understands how I feel so we can become closer. I think the worst part is every time I get off the phone or even talk to my daddy I say “I love you” and I mean it however, I can not remember the last time I said those three oh so powerful words to my mother. I do not exactly like hearing all my friends talk about how they are so close with their moms and how they are “best friends” because it always makes me think of how bad the relationship is between us. The earliest recollection I have of my mother is before we used to fight, obviously if it was my earliest recollection. We went to see Andre the seal and I cried when we left the movie theatre because I did not get a chance to say good bye to André. Somehow it came up in conversation with my sister today and she laughed at me, but then again i now laugh at myself thinking of how i bawled my eyes out all the way home because i didnt get to say goodbye to a seal in a movie. Haha. I definitely want to be a mom when I get older, much older. No I don’t really want to be like my mom. I am too different from her in almost everyway imaginable and I don’t want to change to become her. I would much rather be like my dad. I love him so much and I think he has almost been more of a “mom” for me than my mother. Not in the sense that we do all that girly stuff together but in the sense that I can talk to him about anything and I know I will fully be listened to and that I will get an honest answer no matter what the question. He is always there for me when I need him and he always puts my sister and me first. Unlike my mother he has not yet found another person that he wants to “spend the rest of his life with” and I am almost glad. I am not ready to share my dad yet because I am afraid if he finds someone we will end up with the relationship that my mother and I have. I guess I am getting a little off topic so if I had to tell my mother something she didn’t know in this blog I would probably would ask her why she doesn’t care anymore and why she always agrees with anyone but me? Like I said before. I hope my mother and I are just in that period where we just cant stand each other, but unfortunately I don’t think that that is the case.
Well I have a mom because she’s always there when I need her. Well she’s not always actually in my house because she has to travel a lot for her work, but when she’s away she’s just a phone call away. Actually I think that instead of having a mother or a mom there could also be a father or a dad. My dad has been retired for most of my life. That can be good or bad. When my dad is having a bad day and he just yells the whole day I wish that he would go to work or something. He only gets like that every once and a while and it doesn’t last very long so I can live with that to have the dad I have. Sometimes now that I’m thinking about it I would prefer my dad over my mom. Of course my dad isn’t as easy to get things bye him and he’s harder on me but that might be why I push myself. Just as a side note if it wasn’t for my dad than I would only be in one AP class instead of three. My dad has always taught me that if you work hard at something that you can succeed at it. My dad is home every day except when he needs to go to New York to check up on his property.
When you’re around a person like my dad for so long than you can either love him like me or you could be the exact opposite like my brother. It’s not that I don’t like my mom because I love her just as much as I love my dad. The only thing is that I’m more like my dad and he stands behind me 100% and always pushes me to do better. Also I’m more like my dad than my mom so it’s easier to get along with him.
I agree with Leslie when she says that a parental figure can come from anywhere. There was a time when my parents were on the verge of getting divorced where I would hang out with my best friend Tommy almost every day. During this time period I looked up to his dad as my own dad this went on for a long time where I wanted to move in with them but my other good friend brought me back down to reality when he told me that my role model should be my dad and no-one else’s. I didn’t believe it at first but I decided to give it a chance and now I’m hooked.
I can honestly say that I had no idea what the difference if between a mother and a mom, but as I read other peoples response and I realized that I really did know the difference between a mother and mom. A mother is definitely a female who gave birth to an infant. That is all. A mom, on the other hand, is a female who loves a child unconditionally, who will be there through every mistake and every accomplishment, who will sacrifice her life for the better of a child. That is a mom. Hands down. A mom does not have to be your biological mother. A mom can be your best friend’s mom, your neighbor, or even your own mom. I am lucky enough to have a mom.
The earliest recollection I have of my mom was during potty training. We were still living in Philadelphia, and my parents were still married. I specifically remember her getting up in the early hours of the morning and walking into my room and picking me up out of my bed. She would carry me to the bathroom and sit me on the toilet. I remember this so vividly. I remember sitting on the toilet practically asleep and resting my head on my mom’s shoulder and she sat in from of me, her arms wrapped around me so I wouldn’t fall off, and softly whispering in my ear, “Go pee Meghan.” I know it probably sounds corny, but she did that with me every morning. She did this every morning to potty train me over the night so I wouldn’t wet the bed. She did this every morning because she loved me. She sacrificed her own sleeping time, during a time when my mom would drive everyday from Philadelphia where we lived to Oakcrest. But my mom didn’t care about herself; she only cared about me and my peeing during the night.
As for me being a mom, I would love it. I want to have a lot of kids. Definitely more than three. I want to be a mom that gives her kids every opportunity that is offered to them. I want to have that hectic and chaotic lifestyle with kids running all around the house and the brotherly and sisterly fighting. It is something I have always wanted. But, sometimes I worry because I’m not that much of an affectionate person, like my mom. Hopefully, her mom-ness will grow on me when I have kids. I want to be a good mom like she is. She is so selfless when it comes to me. And I, being a self-sufficient person, need to be that-selfless.
When I read the last question, I first read Hannah’s because I know her mom so well and I wanted to know what she had to say. I found that interesting because I can totally see why Hannah said that. Anyway, if I could tell my mom one thing that she didn’t know before would be that I’m sorry for not appreciating her as much as she should be. She sacrifices so much for me and I don’t always thank her for it. My mom totally deserves it. I would not be where I am or who I am or what I’ve accomplished if it wasn’t for her in my ear pushing me all along the way, reminding me that I can be the best at anything if I put my mind to it. Thank you mom, for everything.
Mother. Mother. I’m sorry, I had to giggle a little! The pure connotation of that word is ridiculous to me. In the Sherman household, the title of “mother” is only used with a sarcastic or simpering tone. “Oh yes, of course mother dearest, I will clean the plates and silverware after dinner!” “Mother, may I please borrow $20 to use at the movies?” These sort of remarks draw a hearty laugh from my mommy. Sometimes, when she’s in a testy mood, she can be heard to say, “Don’t call me that.” I’ve always wondered why. It does sound quite prim, proper, and pompous, as if I should be speaking with a stuffy English accent. After reading some of my classmates’ responses, I’ve found that I agree with them: the word “mother” is only applied to women who have given birth to a child. So, excluding the stuffiness of the title, it is the mere lack of depth that turns true “moms” to turn up their noses.
It seems to be unanimously agreed upon that there is a BIG difference between a mother and a mom. The blatantly obvious has been cleared. As for me, I’ve been blessed a mom. Well, a mommy, as I still like to call her. I once tried to address her as mom, but it felt uncomfortable. I think mommy is a subcategory of mom. Anyway, she totally fits the bill. There are an infinite amount of reasons that I could relay, but the main one is that she has never stifled my character. Even as a kid, she didn’t force me to join a sport or take ballet class. The only activities I took part in were the ones that I chose for myself. Have they stuck with me all these years? No. But I learned to make decisions on my own. Please, don’t get me wrong though. She still picked me when I fell on the ground, put a bandaid on my scraped knee, and bought me a new ice cream cone after I dropped it in the dirt. It was, and still is, her compassion that allowed me to have the courage to make decisions.
There are many blurred memories that I have of my mother from my toddler years. I guess my first “Wow! What an amazing mom!” moment happened on my first day of kindergarten. Every school day, from kindergarten through sixth grade, my mommy dropped me off at a wonderful and magical world called “Before and After”. My memories of Before and After could be spent in another blog altogether. This was a place where parents could dump their kids at before work so they could be sent to school, and pick them up after work. You see the sheer cleverness behind the name. On this first day of kindergarten, my mommy brought me there with all of the other unfortunate girls and boys my age. Believe me, I was not the only one who was nervous. In fact, I was so nervous that I broke down in tears and screamed for her not to leave me. I couldn’t bear her leaving me. She stayed and comforted me for a little while, but then patted my head and said that she really needed to go. There were other new friends to meet and older girls to settle me down, but it wasn’t the same. Like I said before, my mommy is the definition of laid-back love. I needed to do this, and it should never have crossed my mind that she didn’t want me. She only wants me to succeed. Going to Before and After and kindergarten were the first steps. It only just hit me that I’m going to be done next year. Wow. Of course, there’s still college, but that’s a completely different story.
Sometime after high school and college are over, and maybe even between getting a job and going over the hill, I’d love to have children. Children are beautiful. It’s like starting all over again! I’ve made it this far with my life still in order, so why not make new lives? The amount of joy that children bring is unimaginable. I will be just like my mommy. I’ll love them unconditionally, nurture their creativity, encourage their endeavors, and rule with a firm hand at bay when needed. All of those things and more with inspire my motherhood. My only fear is that they won’t succeed, but I think I will shrug it off once I actually hold the baby in my arms. If I turn out like my mommy, it’ll be easy to hope for the best.
I would just like to say a few things to my mommy:
1) Thank you for helping me through the toughest times in my life. I’ll never forget them because they made us the best friends that we are today.
2) Thank you for taking me grocery shopping every Sunday. Those trips are my favorite staple in the week.
3) Thank you for tolerating my brilliant negotiations. I only try to make things easier on you when fall and Christmas shopping come around.
4) Thank you for not giving up on me when I was frustrated about parallel parking. I probably wouldn’t be driving today without those drills.
5) Thank you for still giving me my allowance even if my room isn’t clean. I’ve always told you that it’s beyond repair and once I have my own dorm and house that I will have a fresh, clean start.
6) Thank you for always being happy and bubbly. You are the reason that I try to be the same way.
7) Thank you for trusting me after I got that late detention for skipping class last year. You always know how to alleviate my stress.
8) And finally, thank you for knowing that I’m not amazing at math like you are, and most of all, being okay with it. Even if I get Cs on my report card in precalc, it was you who gave me the jumpstart when you tutored me in algebra.
I just wanted to comment on Mikey’s blog. Mikey, I love you so much, and I tell you that all the time. I can’t say it enough. If I had a brother, I’d want him to be just like you. And if I were your mom, I’d love you even more than I can express. You shouldn’t feel the need to be sorry. I’m probably saying all of this because I’m just another emotional, melodramatic girl, but I know she loves you. Point blank.
I definitely have a mom, but our relationship is complicated. Other people, I know Jo and Emily Row, have said that the reason they get into fights with their mom all the time is because they are so alike. Not so in my case. My mom and I fight all the time because we are fundamentally VERY different people. I am so much more like my dad, to the point that I find it hard to even relate to my mom sometimes. We are so different. She can also be a lot of things that I hate - self-righteous, stubborn (like Em Row's mom, and I happen to know they are actually a lot alike) beyond the point she will even listen to me. She is always saying I baffle her with my intelligence. She is definitely not as smart as I am. Okay, I sound like a huge jerk, but she's said it to me before. She says she could never fathom doing as well in school as I do or having the actual drive to learn. She hates reading. But at the same time, she is also a lot more tolerant than I am, and slightly more of a team player. We can both be somewhat bossy. And we both always have to get the last word (I usually get it, though, and then I slam the door. Yes, I can be a bitchy teenager.). ALWAYS. ALL THE TIME.
That being said, though, she has gone above and beyond the qualities I would associate with a "mother." A mother is simply someone who, as someone said (I've read a lot of these so I don't exactly remember), provides for your physical needs and is emotionally unavailable, or even worse, doesn't provide for either. I guess I don't associate mothers in general with heartlessness because I have never been in contact with a mother who was truly cold and evil, although I know there are some out there. I know a couple families who are raised by single dads, whose mothers gave the kids life and then booked it out of there.
I'm going off on a tangent. What I mean to say is that my mom has provided for me fully, has ultimately been loving and supportive, and while she could be more understanding and tolerant of me (she's tolerant of every freaking body else on the planet), a good mom.
To respond to something Jo said that was interesting, my mom told me some things she's done in high school and college too. I didn't find out in the way she did, reading it in a diary, because my mom just told me point-blank. However, she wouldn't let me read some comments in her yearbook when I was about thirteen. She told me she'd tell me when I'm older, which, now that I am recalling this incident in the first place, is probably about now. But I know she did throw a house party when her parents weren't home when she was sixteen, and she shoplifted when she was a teenager also. She told me these things because she wanted me to know the tremendous feelings of guilt she now associates with both of those events. (The shoplifting was the worst. Her friends peer-pressured her to steal a sweater and after she had it at home it stayed in her closet, haunting her, for days until she finally threw it away. She says she never wore it, or even so much as looked at it, once after she took it.) I know Jo's mom really well, and I can understand how you want to tell her that you found it. I would want to, too, because when my mom told me the things about her past, I was really happy she had told me.
Oh, and Ms. Bunje, I am SO SORRY this is late. I got home around 9:30 and then I read like a million of the blogs and lost track of time. I was aiming to post before ten. It won't happen again :)
I know all about this blog topic which excites me! There is a big difference between being a mom and a mother. A mother is the woman who lies down in a hospital bed for hours in labor and gives birth to you. A mom is the woman who may or may not have given birth to you, but raised you, taught you, and loved you. I my mother is my mom, however, my sister's mother is not her mom. My mother is her mom however, we are half sisters. I never refer to that title. A sister is a sister and a brother is a brother. I don't feel any half love between my five siblings. They are all my half siblings. I love them all with all my heart. Back to my sister, born in 1988, she was born to a woman my father was previously dating. For you to understand this story, I have to take you back to before I was born, I like this, this seems like one of those movies where there is a narrator telling the plot before it starts in first person but it changes to third person, A POINT OF VIEW SHIFT! Well anyway, I'll make this short. My dad was a player with so many girlfriends. Around March 1988, he got a woman preganant, his current girfriend. During her pregnancy, he met my mom. They began a relationship and in December, my older sister was born, by the "other" woman, not my mom. Well, my sister's mom didn't want her, so my mom, being the cute and caring woman that she was took advantage of that. Once my dad told my mom that he got another girl pregnant about a year before, my mom wasn't even mad because at the time they didn't even know each other. My father told my mother that the "other" woman didn't want the baby, and he didn't know what to do. My mom thought "OOO! A baby! I want one!" My mother allowed my sister into her life, and cared for her as a mom. Since birth, she took care of my sister to this VERY day. Wow, anyway, in July 1990, when my sister was about one and a half, she found out that she was pregnant, with me! In April, 1991, my mother birthed and and was also a mother to me. Although my mom isn't her birth mother, my sister was bought up calling her mom and called her birth mother, who she saw very rarely by her first name. It's funny how someone earns the name mom, but could possibly get the name mother. Being a mom is far more important than being a mother, I don't care what anyone says, my sister, first handedly will tell you that in an instant. My earliest recollection of my mother is simply her sleeping. It's funny, but it symbolized her hard work. She worked every night to support my family so we could live comfortably. I do remember and I always will remember he love for me. She showed me so much love. Love is amazing and it helped me grow into the loving person I am today. I remember her spoiling me all the time too. I admire her. I want to be like her except for when I have kids, I will make them clean up. Because my mom spoiled us so much, we never had to clean up. All we did was make messes and have fun. It affected me because to this day, I hate cleaning up. Ironic right? Something I would want my mom to know is that she is the strongest woman I know. I love her soul. That's just gave me goose bumps. That's deep. She teaches me things that she doesn't do intentionally, like when I have break downs about my grandmom, she hugs me and makes everything better. Her love has helped me form into the dedicated girl I am today. She is my EVERYTHING, and if this blog could allow a bigger font, the word everything would be so much better. I love you mother, my mom.
I completely agree with Megan's analogy in the first paragraph of her response. "House is to home as mother is to mom." According to the old saying, "love is what makes a hous a home." So, on that same token, love is what makes a mother a mom. A mother is someone who just gave birth to you, kind of like the scientific term for your biological parent. A mom, on the other hand, will drive you for 45 minutes just to go to a soccer practice, will make your lunch for you even though you're a junior in high school and capable of doing that yourself (and peel and slice your apples if you prefer them that way), or let you be the "taste tester" for her Thanksgiving cookies. As you can see, there is a clear difference between a mother and a mom.
My earliest recollection of my mother is probably when I had half-day kindergarten. (I say probably because I think that I have memories that occur prior to this, but whatever.) So, I would get home from my half-day kindergarten and my mom would be waiting for me at the bus stop always with a smile on her face when i descended the stairs of the bus. We would walk home together talking about what I did in school that day. Then, my mom would make me a cheese sandwich, I would watch Blues Clues, then she would take me to day care. It was always the highlight of my day.
I would say that there are qualities in girls that you can associate with the idea of moms. On Facebook (Ms. Bunje, did you friend me yet?), they have an application called Compare People, where a question, such as "who has a better profile picture?" or "who is smarter?", is asked. You then have a choice between two of your friends, which are picked randomly for the question. Well, one of the questions is "who would make a better mother?" And, for some reason, I always know who to pick. I guess that I think of a kind, smart, genuine person, who seems like they would love their child no matter what and always knows what to say.
In this way, I guess I would want to be "motherly." However, in regards to the whole female reuirement to be a mother, I think I'll pass.
Okay, so now the last question posed to us. My answer kind of reminds me of that song 9I can't remember the name of it, but I can sing it for you if you'd like) that says, "These three words are said too much but not enough." I know that my mom knows that I love her but I guess I should say it more often. So, I would like to say, "Mom, if you secretly read my blogs while I'm not looking, I would like to say that I love you. And that you have no life if this is what you read for entertainment."
Okay I'm posting again, partially because I figured not too many people would come back on here, and partially because I need to get a few things off my chest. I thought about the last question, the one about what we would say to our moms. So here it goes:
Mom, I wish you were more understanding of me. I'm not a little kid anymore, and I can do things on my own. I know you were a teenager once, and you went through the same things as me. Just listen when I try and talk to you and don't jump down my throat with things that I already know. I really do appreciate you, even though I don't always show it straight out. But I just need a little freedom so I can grow up and learn to make my own decisions. If you ever read this, I want you to know I love you and will always be there for you like you have been for me. Love, Hannah.
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